


Contemporary

by bluegreenish



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Dance, Blow Jobs, Contemporary Dance, Dancer!Louis, F/M, Hand Jobs, Harry struggles with gay stereotypes a lot, Hospitals, Identity Issues, Implied/Referenced Sex, Injury, James Corden has a cute daughter, Leeds - Freeform, M/M, So many song references, Stereotypes, christie cup, dance shows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:29:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 41,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24145912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluegreenish/pseuds/bluegreenish
Summary: Gesturing to the door, Louis breaks the silence. “Sorry, I should get ready for practice.”Harry agrees and tries to not show that he’s a tiny bit disappointed this conversation is already ending.“But if you’re okay with it, I’d like to get your number? We keep contact info of the parents or whoever regularly picks up the kids from dancing and it seems that you’ve become a regular too.”To be honest, Harry isn’t sure if this is Louis flirting with him or if he really is only interested in updating their contact list, but it sure is a creative way of asking for a number in case he’s hoping for something more.or, the one where Louis is a confident contemporary dancer, Harry finds himself at his studio more often than he ever thought he would due to picking up his friend’s daughter and they both work through a lot of ups and downs.
Relationships: Gigi Hadid/Zayn Malik, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Liam Payne/Sophia Smith
Comments: 9
Kudos: 62





	Contemporary

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!  
> Welcome to my first fanfic! I'm super nervous to put this out here but also super glad it's finally done.  
> I don't even know why this was the first idea I really finished writing a fanfic about and it's definitely a bit bumpy in some places.  
> No clue why James Corden and his family (that I made up) are so prominent but well, just roll with that and all the other inaccuracies I guess.
> 
> This is a work of fiction, I do not own anything but the work I put into it and I do not intend to offend anyone.
> 
> Enjoy reading :)

“So what kind of dancing is Lilly doing exactly?”, Harry asks as he waits for the pedestrian light to turn green. 

“Contemporary dance I think it’s called. Contemporary jazz?” James pulls a questioning face. “To be honest, I’m not entirely sure, but I think it’s contemporary dance. Yeah.“ 

It’s currently Thursday evening, end of September, meaning Harry has just begun his first master semester.   
He and his new found friend James Corden are on the way to pick up James’ daughter, who has only recently started dancing, as James informs him. 

“I don’t even know why she was so set on dancing. Like, Cassie’s a swimmer and I certainly am not a dancer either“, James says as they cross the street and take a turn left.   
“One weekend morning she just woke us up and was like “Mum, Dad, I want to dance!” and I was like, uh, alright.“

Cassie, James’ longterm girlfriend, had accidentally gotten pregnant shortly after they finished A-levels, meaning a huge change of future plans for the couple. Which is how James finds himself in the same year of university as Harry, even though he is a couple years older. Harry and James have only known each other for a few short weeks, since fresher’s week, but Harry is already glad to call him his friend.

He likes spending time with James, even though he is aware that he doesn’t always have time for him. They’re partners in crime (literally, they share the social work law lecture) in uni, but James has a family he needs to tend to and Harry has well… No one.   
But that’s okay, considering Harry has only been studying in Leeds for a few weeks and he’d made it his priority to settle in peacefully before he’d go out and about to be social.

“What time’s it?”

Harry fumbles his phone out of his jeans pocket and wakes up the screen. “5:56.”

“Sweet, I’m finally on time. Last two times I was a little late, Cassie almost had my head when Lilly told her. The little snitch.”

When Harry looks up from the text message his mum has sent him, he finds himself in front of a plain grey building which could very well just be another block of flats. The sign on the wall next to the glass door looks worn down by the weather and some of the letters are faded.   
Harry lets his eyes skim over it shortly. Second floor: _Dance Studio Holbeck_. 

Following James inside, Harry isn’t entirely sure what he had expected the Dance Studio would look like. A part of him thought they’d just go to a regular gym and wait outside the changing rooms for Lilly to storm out. Or maybe the studio where the final audition in flashdance took place, with noble wooden floor. 

What he hadn’t been expecting is probably this though. Dark tiles on the ground that have most likely been there since the building was built back in the 50s. A handrail that looks liked it’s only every painted over and never cleaned adorning the staircase.

As Harry and James arrive on the second story, the only door in sight is suddenly thrown open and kids start to pour out of the studio. Most of them are girls, with their hair up in pony tails or elaborate plaits. 

Lilly has yet to come out and as the group of kids and their parents slowly dissipate and the girl still isn’t in sight, James enters the studio to look for his daugther.

Not knowing what to do with himself, Harry follows him suit.

Just as he is about to step over the threshold, a little girl who had been running straight towards the door without paying attention crashes into him.  
She falls backwards almost comically, starting to cry before she even hits the ground.

“Shit. Are you okay? Shh, everything’s okay”, Harry tries to soothe her, bending down, unsure whether it is okay to pick her up. It’s not like he knows what to do in these kind of situation. The smallest kid in his family is his cousin and he’s fourteen now. 

“Hey, shh, you’re alright. Where does it hurt?” 

Still in a crouching position, Harry looks around for help hastily. They’re on the threshold to a rectengular room that’s about the size of Harry’s bedroom. Judging from his barely existent dance knowledge Harry would guess this isn’t the actual studio. Well, obviously, there aren’t really any … dancey things around, like a rail on a mirrored wall. That’s what you need for dancing, right?

“Liam!”, the little girl starts screaming. 

Only seconds later, a friendly looking boy around Harry’s age emerges from a door to their left that Harry hasn’t noticed before. 

“Annabel, sweetie, shh I’m here”, the man says and picks her up from he she’s still half lying on the floor. 

“Lou, can you get me an ice pack?”, he calls over his shoulder. Looking up from where Annabel is now sitting upright, still with shiny tears in her eyes, the man faces Harry. 

”What happened?”

“Uh, I came in through the door and she ran into me and fell”, Harry attempts to explain. Nice. First time here and he already sends a kid to hospital. That surely leaves a good impression. 

“Leeyum, my head hurts”, the girl claims and dramatically grabs the back of her head. Shit, Harry doesn’t even want to think about facing the girl’s parents. Oh god, what if they sue him.

“Here you go”, another man appears and hands over one of these ice packs that you activate by hitting it against something solid. 

Harry can’t help but notice the comfortable looking dark blue trackies on him. On some people trackies just look flattering, emphasising the shape of their legs. This man definitely falls into that category. If Harry hadn’t just run over a 5-year-old he might have directed further attention towards it. 

“Thanks Lou. Here Annabel, Louis brought us an ice pack, your head is going to be tippy toppy in just a few minutes!” It’s obvious that it’s not Liam’s first time comforting a child. Harry wishes he could handle the girl’s upset this easily and intuitively. 

The girl inspects the ice pack sceptically but agrees to put it to her head when the man who’s only recently joined them adds “You’re going to be like Elsa!”.

A few minutes later, the girl has finally calmed down completely. James and Lilly join them when they hear the turmoil that Harry has caused and agree that they’ll wait with Liam and Annabel until she gets picked up, in case she suddenly feels worse. She doesn’t though and Harry breathes a sigh of relief when her mum picks up the little girl and she happily recounts all the new dance moves they’ve learned that day, seemingly forgetting about the incident. 

When mother and daughter are out of sight, Harry turns to Liam and James. 

“Ugh. I’m so sorry! I usually don’t go and run over children, I promise.“

“It’s all good, don’t worry. Accidents happen.” Liam smiles at him kindly, his brown eyes crinkled. 

“I’m pretty sure she didn’t fall on her head though. Just her bottom“, Harry adds. 

Liam shrugs. “It was probably more the shock than actual pain. And to be honest, Annabel can be a bit of a drama queen. Giving them an ice pack usually does the trick“, he smiles again, genuinely, then repeats, “Seriously, don’t worry to much.”

Before Liam can usher them out, Lilly grabs at her dad’s jacket and exclaims “Daddy I forgot my bottle inside!”.

A second later she’s through the door and back in the studio in search of her water bottle. The three men follow her and finally, Harry gets a peek into the room where the actual dancing seems to be happening. 

It doesn’t look like the flashdance studio. If anything, it reminds him of the location in Dirty Dancing where Baby and Johnny practice when Hungry Eyes starts playing in the background. Mhh, young Patrick Swayze.

Honestly, Harry also doesn’t have any more resources to compare with. Those are probably the only two films containing proper dancing that he’s ever seen in his life. 

Drawn out of his thoughts, he lets his eyes roam around. The floor is some rubbery material that he can’t place, the walls a plain white, one mirrored. And french windows, of course. It seems that every proper studio needs french windows. 

Most of the dancers eye them curiously where they’re standing in the entrance, all busy strechting various muscles. Currently there’s soft instrumental music playing, probably meant for the warm-up phase.

The ice-pack man is sitting on the floor, now in footie shorts instead of his trackies, legs strechted in front of him and bending down so his upper body is touching his thighs completely and his hands reach his feet. It’s impressive.   
Even though Harry is aware that probably every regular dancer or athlete is able to do that, it doesn’t make it less impressive on this boy.

“I got it!”, Lilly finally comes running back to them, her pink plastic bottle swaying from the string attached to it. 

“Then let’s get out of here so Liam can practice too, sweetie. Come on. Bye!”, James speaks the final words before they turn around to make their way home. 

Originally, James had joked about Harry tagging along to pick Lilly up when they were bored and distracted in their research methods seminar Thursday evening. Harry had simply said “Sure, why not”. It’s not like he had plans that evening except for eating and procrastinating anything related to responsibilities. When Harry sits down on his bed with a bowl full of warmed up pesto that evening, he thinks that maybe he’d offer to accompany James again. Maybe get some chinese takeaway or subway on his way home the next time. 

James isn’t actually present in seminar the following week, so that’s how two weeks later, Harry tags along to pick up Lilly from dance class once again. The three of them would take the bus to James’ and Cassie’s flat, preparing dinner so that when Cassie comes home from her shift at the café she works at, they’d be ready to eat.   
James had actually been thankful for Harry’s suggestion to cook, apparently being not much of a cook himself.   
“I’m not being sexist when I say that in our relationship, the woman definitely belongs in the kitchen. But that’s only because Cassie doesn’t burn the whole block down. It’s in everyone’s interest, believe me.”

  
Harry climbs the stairs quickly, trying to keep up with James who is taking two stairs at a time. 

“Shit, shit, shit we’re so late!”

They’re both breathing loudly as they arrive at the door to the anteroom. No parents are in sight anymore, which is not surprising as they’re a total of twentyone minutes late. 

James rips the door open forcefully and it’d bang against the wall if it hadn’t been one of these soft closing doors. 

The anteroom is dark, the little window across the door covered by greenish curtains that remind Harry of the ones they had at school. 

Now more cautiously, James opens the door to their left that leads them to the studio in order to not disturb anyone and carefully sticks his head in. Music can be heard from inside and no one stops them from entering so that’s what they do. 

Inside, there is actually dancing happening this time. From what Harry figures, it’s not a full choreographed dance yet, at least that’s not what it looks like. About a dozen dancers are scattered in the room. Or well, not scattered, they are pirouetting in rows and it actually makes an organised impression. 

He spots Lilly sitting cross legged inbetween the sports bags and jackets close to the wall, her elbows on her knees and in total awe of the grown up dancers in front of her. It’s cute to watch and Harry doesn’t even try to hide a smile. Growing up he always used to idolise the older footie or badminton players that practiced after him and told himself he’d be like that one day. Well, yeah. 

Together, James and he wait until the dancers are finished with the pirouetts before he makes himself noticed.

“Lilly!”, James calls his daugther. 

She scrambles up, grabs her sports bag and runs towards her dad with a big smile plastered on her face. This girl is absolutely amazing in Harry’s opinion. If his mother had forgotten to pick him up from anywhere or was a mere five minutes late, he’d had flipped his shit and cried and not talked to her until she in-depth apologised to him and perheps also promised ice cream as an apology. He was spoiled rotten, still is.

“Daddy! Harry! Look, Liam is dancing!”

“I know, honey. I’m sorry I’m late, Harry and I had to stay at our school a bit longer than we thought.“

Lovingly, James runs his fingers through his daugther’s ponytail while she keeps babbling about how amazing Liam and the other dancers are.   
Whenever Harry sees them interact, or the three of them really, he feels reassured that this it what he wants in his future. 

The music isn’t turned off but someone lowers the volume when Liam comes over to them, sweating slightly. Fortunately, he doesn’t look cross.

“Hi Liam. I’m so sorry we’re late again. We got held up at uni and the traffic was mad…”, James begins to explain. 

“Hey, it’s all good. I was just worried, but I know how uni can be. It’s cool you’re trying to make it work for Lilly though, and it’s really no problem at all to keep her here a few minutes after practice ends. I’m sure she enjoyed watching us.”

“Yes! Daddy, they dance to a song and the singer is called Lilly too! Lilly Cashew…”, Lilly nods enthusiastically, seemingly not tired at all from her dance lesson. 

“Lily Kershaw, actually. Her name’s only spelled with one L though instead of double L, I believe”, Liam corrects softly. 

Lilly pulls a face like she is genuinely disgusted by that idea. “Ew. But that’s because my name is really unique! Because my name is Lillian!”

Only half-listening in on the conversation, Harry’s attention skips from dancer to dancer. A girl with blonde hair in leggings and a skin-tight shirt is currently holding her leg up to her head so her legs are at a perfect 180° angle. She’s objectively pretty and very flexible and it’s kind of not fair. Two girls, one with black braids and the other one with a simple brown-haired ponytail are passionately discussing how a certain dance move is performed correctly. 

Harry is surprised to spot another boy who slightly resembles Shawn Mendes. He’s wearing baggy trackies matched with a white tanktop and he’s definitely muscular enough to pull it off. Once again, kind of unfair. 

And oh. Ice-pack-blue-trackies-boy is present too and staring directly at him. Not annoyed or unfriendly, more with a glint of interest in his eyes, but he definitely caught Harry checking out the other dancers. 

Refusing to feel bad about his curiosity, Harry simply shoots him a smile and redirects his attention to the conversation going on next to him again. 

“Liam, sorry to interrupt, but you coming?”, the pretty blonde is calling for him.

“Comin’!”, he answers over his shoulder before facing back to the three of them. “Sorry, I should…”, he says and gestures towards his waiting group. 

“Yes, yes, go. Sorry for occupying your practice time for so long”, James apologises once again and guides Lilly out of the room with his hand on her shoulder. 

“Bye-bye”, Lilly shouts and every one in the room says their bye. 

Just before Harry closes the door after himself, he looks back into the studio to find ice-pack-blue-trackies-boy smiling at him. 

Walking down the stairs, James turns towards his daughter again: “Please don’t tell mummy I was late again. Okay, sweetie?”

“Okay, daddy“, Lilly agrees. 

The first thing she does when Cassie enters the flat is tell her how late Daddy and Harry were. 

  
James and Harry are in their weekly research methods seminar on Thursday evening once again, and unsurprisingly, it’s boring as hell. 

Everything the prof explains seems unneccessary to know in real life and while Harry doesn’t know a hundred percent what he wants to do after graduating, he knows damn well that it won’t be anything that requires an extensive knowledge of everything research methods related. 

At this point in class, Harry’s sheet of paper is well decorated with doodles of little birds even though he promised to himself that he’d try to pay attention and take notes today. Last time he barely had an idea what he had to do for homework because he was asleep virtually the whole seminar.

That’s exactly the state James is bravely fighting right now. His head is resting on his hand and his cheek is pushed so far up that his teeth are actually showing. 

All of a sudden, the screen of James’ phone lights up and a strange number calls him. Luckily, it doesn’t make any noises because as a girl from their seminar found out last week, their professor is not a fan of that. 

James watches his phone with a confused expression for a second before he excuses himself to answer an “urgent call”, surely more using the phone call as an excuse than wanting to talk to whoever it is that’s calling. 

In hindsight, it’s good he decided to pick up, because when re-enters the room, James looks like he’s seen a whole army of ghosts. 

Instead of plopping down next to Harry, he proceeds to simply pack up his backpack. 

“Hey, what’s going on?”, Harry whispers, slightly alarmed. 

James gulps, but keeps stuffing his folder deeper into the bag frantically. “Cassie was in a bus accident. The hospital just called me.”

“Shit, is she alright?”

“She’s stable and it didn’t sound as if she was fatally injured or anything, but I’m going to the hospital now”, James carries on. 

“Yeah, go, go!“  
At this point, their professor decides to step in. “Mr. Corden, what seems to be the problem?”

“I’m sorry, but I’ve got to leave now. My fiancée was in bus accident and she’s in hospital”, then realisation flows across his face, “Fuck. Fuck, Harry, I’m supposed to pick up Lilly from dance class! I can’t go now. It’d take my neighbour ages to get to the studio and he doesn’t even know where it is. Fuck!” His hand wanders across his face and he sits down on his seat visibly stressed. 

Without thinking twice, Harry says “Bullshit, go now. I’ll pick up Lilly. I know where the studio is and Liam knows me so he’ll trust me with her.”  
James looks down to him, not even noticing how everyone in the seminar is following their conversation quietly. “Really?”

“Of course. Go! I’m serious.” He smiles at his friend reassuringly, even though he too is worried about Cassie. “And text me when you know more”, he adds. 

It seems that James is convinced because he stands up again, pulling on his jacket quickly and throwing his backpack over the right shoulder. 

“I will. Thanks so much, Harry.“ 

Then, he’s out the door with another short “I’m sorry” shot towards his professor. 

  
It’s Harry’s goal to arrive at the studio on time but he realises he failed at that when he checks his phone for the time. He accidentally took a wrong turn before he finally admitted defeat and whipped out his phone to follow the Maps directions.

He’s a whole fifteen minutes late and he still hasn’t figured out how to handle the whole situation. Does he tell Lilly where her mum is right now? What is he supposed to do when she starts freaking out?

He pushes open the front door of the building and climbs the stairs still pondering what to say to his friend’s daughter when he is forced to stop by someone sitting on the stairs. 

Blue eyes look up to Harry and he peripherally registers fingers locking the phone screen those pretty blue eyes were glued to before. 

“Uh… I’m sorry I’m late?”, Harry offers and it comes out more like a question than a statement. 

The blue eyes belong to ice-pack-blue-trackies-boy. He cracks a smile. 

“I think Lilly is used to it by now.”

Speaking of, where is Lilly?

“Hi Harry!”, the little girl speaks up the next second. She’s standing a few stairs higher up, a strawberry milk clutched in her hands, her sports bag and jacket abandoned next to her.  
“Look, Lou gave me a strawberry milk!”

Harry shoots her an overly enthusiastic smile to match hers, trying not to show what is going on and that the reason he’s here is not explicity a happy one. 

“That’s very nice of him. Did you say thank you?”

“Sure did! Mummy tells me to always say please and thank you”, she explains proudly and continues sucking on the straw. 

Without faltering in his happy facial expression, he turns to the man again, talking quietly so Lilly doesn’t listen in too much. She doesn’t seem bothered by anything, humming a Disney song while dancing around.   
“I’m sorry I’m late, and I hope it’s okay for me to take her home? I mean, you’ve seen me before, and she obviously knows me”, Harry starts, but the man interrupts him. 

“Listen, I don’t want to be rude, but my flatmate was in a bus accident and he’s being brought into hospital and I’d like to go there as soon as possible. So maybe we could just leave? I trust you with Lilly, I’ve seen you with James. It’s all good.”

He gets up from where he had been sitting with his legs spread like a model in a photo shooting. Not that Harry noticed or anything. Standing up, he’s about two inches taller than Harry but he’s also standing a whole stair above him. 

“What a coincidence. That’s actually why I’m here.” Harry leans in a little and tries to lower his voice even more, in order to prevent Lilly from hearing the next sentence. “Her mum is in hospital too. She was in a bus accident too, the same I’m guessing. James went there as soon as he heard.”

The boy looks at him for a second and before closing his eyes. “Shit.”

“Yeah.”

It’s quiet for a moment, then the boy speaks up again. “Okay, if you’re headed to the hospital too, I can drive us.”

Thinking about it, that seems like a good idea, but only if Harry is certain that Cassie is not in intensive care or surgery and at least looks presentable enough for her daughter to see and not start crying. 

“Can I call James? I don’t want to take her if her mum is, you know… not doing good.”

Before he can finish that sentence, the man nods. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll wait here with her and you can go call him outside? So she doesn’t hear.”

Harry agrees and heads downstairs quickly, already scrolling through his contacts and stopping at James’. When he pushes the door open to exit the hallway, he distinctively hears Lilly talking about a choreography or the like.

After a few seconds of hearing the calling noise, James finally picks up. “Harry?”

“Yeah, it’s me.” Unsure how to continue and not wanting to ask the wrong questions, Harry decides to stay quiet. 

“Cassie’s okay. Well. A broken arm and bruised ribs and a whiplash. But it’s going to be okay.” Harry hears him breathes out in relief. 

“That’s good. I’m glad!“ His gaze wanders to the old lady who is walking her cocker spaniel on the other side of the road. “What do you want me to do? Like, should I bring Lilly to the hospital? Or home with me?”

“Wait, I’ll ask Cassie what she thinks is best”, James says before the line goes quiet for a while.  
“If you want to, you can bring her. But I can also just pick her up on my way home. You’ve already done so much for us.”

Not responding to James’ guilt trip, Harry simply says “See you in a few”, before heading inside again. 

The man looks at him questioningly and Harry nods in response, conveying _yeah she’s okay, it’s okay to bring it up_ without words. 

“Lilly, sweetie?”

“Mh?”, she looks up from the phone she is most likely watching a dance video on. 

Harry bends down so he’s about her height and it’s tiny a bit difficult to find his balance while crouched on a stair.

“Your mummy had a little accident and she had to go see a doctor in the hospital. But she’s okay and we’re going to go see her now, okay?”

Insecurity and fear flashes across her face. “What happened to mummy?”

“I don’t know in detail, but mummy can tell us when we’re there, yeah?”

Lilly just nods and gets up to gather her things, giving back the phone to the man. Harry faces him as he gets up. 

“Lou, it is, right?”, Harry checks, recalling the name he’s heard before.

“Louis, yeah.”

Harry tries not to feel awkward at having used a nickname probably used by close friends and their dance kids, but well, he couldn’t have known. He’ll just call him Louis from now on. It’s a pretty name. Unique. And french, fits the dancing profile. 

Louis puts on his jacket and shoulders his bag while Harry makes sure that Lilly doesn’t forget anything she brought, double checking on the water bottle. They make their way down the stairs, careful that Lilly doesn’t slip and break her neck. Harry definitely wants to be trusted to babysit her in the future, perhaps even pick her up from dance class again. Lilly isn’t humming anymore and other than their footsteps on the tiles, it’s silent. 

“So… you got a car?”, Harry asks stupidly, wanting to break the silence. 

“That don’t impress me much”, Louis sings back, causing Harry to laugh out loud. 

“Shania Twain. Good call.”

“Shania is always a good choice”, Louis agrees as he holds open the heavy glass front door for Lilly and Harry. “But yes, I’ve got a car. That baby over there.”

Following Louis’ gesturing, Harry finds himself looking at a silver Ford Fiesta, parked on the other side of the road where the dog lady had just walked five minutes ago. 

“Used to be my mum’s car”, Louis offers as he settles them all in. But that’s not what catches Harry’s attention. 

“Can I ask where you just got that child seat from like it’s totally normal to have one in a car?”, he questions as he fastens his seat belt. 

“Still had it in the boot.”

“Yeah, but why?”

Louis shrugs and looks over his right shoulder to make sure there’s no cars behind them before pulling into the street. 

“For my younger siblings. Forgot to leave it at home when I visited”, not giving a chance to go further into the topic of family, he asks “The hospital a few streets from here, right? They weren’t brought to St. Mary, right?”

“I think so, yeah.”

For a few minutes, Harry looks out of his window and listens to Lilly singing along to a Jonas Brothers song on the radio. He’s glad she’s not freaking out completely or shutting him out. In the end, she’s only known him for a few weeks too, and Harry doesn’t know how long she’s known Louis for. 

“Where is Liam, by the way? And your group?”

Louis takes a turn left and directs his gaze to pedestrians who look unsure of where they want to go and are swaying way too close to the street. 

“We cancelled today, too many were busy. And Liam’s sick, caught a cold. I took over his class today.”

Nodding in understanding, Harry looks to his right to see how easily Louis changes gears with his other hand casually guiding the steering wheel. It’s not like Harry is a newbie driver himself but he’s sure he doesn’t look as relaxed whenever he’s driving his mum’s car at home. To be fair though, he barely gets to drive as doesn’t visit his family as often as he used to and neither is he able to afford a car nor does he urgently need one. 

“Thanks for staying with Lilly, again.”

“No problem, she’s a sunshine to have around anyway.”

Now more or less singing along to a more upbeat song, Lilly starts kicking the back of Louis’ seat without rhythm. Harry doesn’t know the lyrics to the song although he’s probably heard it on the radio before, but Lilly doesn’t seem to care about the correct lyrics anyways, repeating whatever she thinks the words are. 

“Lilly, please stop kicking the seat, Louis probably put a lot of effort into cleaning his car.” Scolding children without being a killjoy is hard and Harry is aware he is in no position to try and pretend he has as much to say as Lilly’s parents. Doesn’t mean he wants to leave a bad impression on Louis. 

Said boy looks over him with an amused look and a smile playing around his lips. 

“If we’re being _really_ honest here, this car is a mess. I’m glad I tidied up a bit yesterday. There were too much McDonalds wrappers back there, it’s a serious problem.”

“You’re one of these people? Oh god, last time I’m riding with you”, Harry teases.

Louis shrugs and keeps focusing on the traffic light but smiles. “Your loss.”

“Lou, can we get some Maccies?”, comes from the backseat. It kind of stings that Lilly only addresses Louis but Harry refuses to take it personal. She’s just a child and she doesn’t mean to make him feel bad. Maybe she believes that Louis will agree more easily. 

“Great, now look what you’ve done.” It’s obviously a joke and Louis knows that. 

“I could use some Maccies”, Louis contributes and Harry fakes an unnerved groan. Hearing Louis laugh a little is worth it. 

Now with a little more serious tone but still light to not put Lilly in a bad mood, Harry turns in his seat to face her. “We’re going to see mummy now first, remember? Maybe we can convince Daddy to get some takeaway on our way home though.” He winks exaggeratedly and Lilly seems satisfied with that answer. 

During the next few minutes, he returns to staring out of the window and listening to the weather forecast on the radio. 

“I’m going to park over there”, Louis announces. They don’t struggle finding the right entrance even though neither of them have been here before. The lady at the front desk looks tired and replies with as little words as possible, describing the way to the ward Cassie and Louis’ flatmate Zayn are currently being treated at. 

Taking the lift instead of the stairs, they step out on third level and take a turn right, following the numbered signs. Without a warning, Lilly takes off and starts running, as fast as possible with her sports gear dangling from her shoulders. 

“Lilly, wait!”, Harry calls after her. He follows her with fast steps and turns around to find Louis has stopped in front of a door. 

“Zayn’s in here. Go after Lilly”, he says and knocks softly onto the white door, waiting a second before opening it slowly. 

Harry turns around again to find Lilly scooped up in James’ arms where they’re standing further down the hallway, supported on his hip. James’ blond hair is tousled and he looks exhausted but in Harry’s grown up opinion, he’s good at hiding it from his daughter. 

“Hey”, Harry greets him as he steps closer. 

“Hey. Thanks for coming. How did you get here?”, James questions as he puts down Lilly to the floor under whiny protest. 

“Lou drove us here!”, Lilly provides before tugging on James’ shirt to grab his full attention. “Where’s mummy?”

“In there, love”, he points to the door behind them. “Don’t be scared when you see mummy. You know when you fall and hurt your knee and we put a band-aid on it so it will heal nicely?“ Lilly nods with big eyes. “That’s what the doctor did with mummy. It might look scary but it makes sure mummy feels better.”

When they enter the room, Cassie is lying in a bed close to the window, sporting a big white cast on her left arm, a band-aid on her forehead and Harry guesses that her upper body is bandanged too, as James’ had mentioned bruised ribs before. 

Harry offers to leave the family alone shortly after, but James decides that he and Lilly will head home with him and get some food on the way. Cassie would have to stay overnight because the doctors want to monitor her due to the whiplash. He wishes her a speedy recovery before they’re off to McDonald’s and when Harry orders a Chicken Burger, an image of Louis’ car full of McDonald’s wrappers pops up in his mind. 

  
The bus accident is the ultimate hot topic the next day and it feels like everyone knows someone who knows someone who’s heard of someone who was involved. Turns out, the bus driver was suffering from fatigue and had run over a red light, causing another bus crossing the street to crash into it. Basically it was a double bus accident and some people were having a field day selling it the most dramatic way possible.

In the end, Harry is just glad the only person involved he knows is discharged from the hospital a day later. He texts James their homework and the notes he finally forced himself to take during classes and also brings the family Subway on Monday evening. 

On Wednesday night Harry is added to a group chat with the title “Bar hopping” by someone from his research methods seminar that he barely remembers the name of. Apparently it’s planned for the following day. And while it’s a nice gesture, Harry isn’t really in the mood, especially because he knows James won’t come. James picked up more shifts at the cinema for the rest of the month, trying to cover the money they’re missing because Cassie won’t go back to work for a while.

**Harry: I can pick up Lilly from dancing tmrrw**

**James: thanks but its ok, already talked to our neighbour**

**Harry: then tell him he doesnt need to. i wanna thank louis for taking us anyways**

**Harry: srsly its no prob, ill make sure to be on time**

**James: you just want a reason to talk to louis again, be honest**

The suggestive looking emoji attached to James’ last message is staring right back at Harry. But no, definitely no, he just wants to be a good friend and help a family in a stressful situation and he’s definitely not offering this just to talk to Louis again. Before he can figure out how to convey this to James, he receives another text.

**James: but if u really dont mind, itd be the easiest solution. thanks!**

**Harry: nothing to thank for :)**

**James: once we’re back to normal, i owe you a couple beers mate**

  
Thankfully, Harry now more or less has a reason to cancel on the bar hopping tomorrow without feeling too guilty about it. 

It kind of begins to feel like a routine for Harry to push open the door to _Dance Studio Holbeck_ , or maybe more like a déjà-vu as this is only the fourth time he’s actually here.   
This time though, he’s on time and proud of himself. It’s a nice sunny day outside, not too warm but everything drenched in a friendly autumny light, the leaves shining in bright colours. It’s like having golden hour all day and it’s easy to be in a good mood. 

The dance lesson hasn’t ended yet apparently, seeing as a dozen parents are waiting in the stair case in front of the closed door. Some are chattering to each other quietly, others are typing away on their phones looking stressed out, a few still dressed in fancy work clothes. 

Harry gives those who look up when he climbs the stairs a nod and a closed-lip smile and finds himself a spot to lean against the wall. He wonders if anyone here believes that he’s a dad too, waiting to pick up his daughter, or if it’s easy to guess that he’s just a stand-in. 

  
A few seconds later, children start pouring out of the anteroom and the stair case is filled with noise. Harry is a bit jealous that all these kids don’t need to worry about anything yet. They go to pre-school or kindergarten and meet up with their friends to play and have their parents pick them up after sports so they’re on time watching kid’s cartoon before going to bed. No rent to pay, no important exams to pass, no life decisions to make. 

“Hi Harry!”, Lilly greets him with a smile. He’s glad James explained to her that Harry would be picking her up, he doesn’t want a surprise visit of his to be connected with bad news. 

“Hey sweetie.” He holds his hand out for Lilly to give him her sports bag. James’ told him when he first met that they’re trying not to spoil her too much and that’s she’s very much capable of carrying her own small bags, but well. What James doesn’t know.   
“How was dancing? Did you have fun?”

She nods energetically and smiles up to him, showing all the teeth she has. “Yes so much! We decided what song we dance to today. We’ll have a big dance at Christmas!”

“Oh that sounds very exciting, you’ll have to tell me all about it.”

The more he interacts with Lilly or watches Cassie and James, the more he gets the hang of what to say to her, Harry thinks. Sometimes he still doesn’t know what kind of answer to expect from her though. He doesn’t want to overwhelm her but he surely doesn’t want to treat her like a baby either, he used to hate it when people didn’t take him seriously when he was younger.

“I can make daddy show you the song on youtoo”, she offers. 

“Sure, we can ask him when we get home”, Harry assures when Louis comes up the stairs, looking like he’d been in a hurry. “Oh, hey.”

Louis turns to him with a confused face before he recognises the person that greeted him, his mouth turning up to a smile. It automatically makes Harry smile back.

“Hi.”

“Glad to see that you’re running late too sometimes.”

Louis makes a fake indignant sound and checks his wrist for a non existent watch to tell him the time. “I don’t know what you mean, I’m totally on time.”

“Sure, sure”, Harry shifts his weight from one foot to another and checks on Lilly quickly. She’s attempting to do pirouttes with a girl with pig tails. “Listen, I want to thank you for taking us to the hospital last week. I think I didn’t really say thanks last week because Lilly ran off, so yeah.”

His smile is so bright his eyes crinkle and Harry can’t help but notice how attractive it looks. Just like the blue trackies he’s wearing once again. Harry is weak for them, apparently. Louis nods and puts his sports bag down on a stair so he can unzip his jacket. 

“No problem, really. I was headed there anyways.”

“How’s your flatmate doing then? Zayn, right?” Harry is painfully aware that he’s keeping Louis from his own practice time but he’s curious about Zayn and he wants to drag this out as long as possible.

“Yeah, he’s doing good. Had his shoulder dislocated and he’s definitely taking advantage of his injury, had me running for him as if I’m his personal servant”, Louis laughs. 

“I’m glad.”

“Yeah, yeah. And Lilly’s mum?”

The stair case begins to clear, most parents heading home with their kids and pushing past Louis where he’s standing on the stairs. He kicks his bag to the side so no one stumbles over it. 

“She was discharged on Friday but she’s still got a cast and bandage and stuff. But she’s getting better slowly. I’m trying to help them where I can and they’ll let me.”  
It sounds a bit like he’s tooting his own horn, but he’s trying really hard to be an attentive friend and that shouldn’t be a bad thing. 

“That’s nice of you.”

Harry nods softly and looks over to Lilly again. The other little girl seems to have left without Harry noticing, as Lilly is now talking to one of the dancers of Louis’ group, not minding at all that she’s an adult she barely knows.

Gesturing to the door, Louis breaks the silence. “Sorry, I should get ready for practice.”

Harry agrees and tries to not show that he’s a tiny bit disappointed this conversation is already ending. 

“But if you’re okay with it, I’d like to get your number? We keep contact info of the parents or whoever regularly picks up the kids from dancing and it seems that you’ve become a regular too.”

To be honest, Harry isn’t sure if this is Louis flirting with him or if he really is only interested in updating their contact list, but it sure is a creative way of asking for a number in case he’s hoping for something more. 

“Uh, yeah, sure. Should I put it into your phone?”

“Yeah, a second.” Louis pats his pockets and produces a phone, unlocking it and opening a new contact for Harry to type in his number. “Here.”

Giving back the phone after double checking he didn’t make a mistake, Harry’s insides feel squirmy.

“We’ll still contact James if something comes up, but yeah. In case we’re ending dance class a different time or anything”, Louis babbles. 

“Does that happen often?”

“Not really, no. But still. What if you decide to run someone over again and I’ll need to forward your contact to the parents of the poor child?”

Okay, this can definitely be considered flirting, right? Right?  
Either way, Harry’s cheeks heat up, being reminded of his first ever encounter with Louis. It’s easy to get him embarrassed and Louis is playing it well. 

“It’s not like I did that on purpose”, he defends himself and starts fumbling with the zipper of his jacket. 

“I know.” 

Music starts playing in the studio and it’s a cue that Louis should get going. He picks up his bag from the ground and puts the strap over his shoulder, making sure it doesn’t slip off. 

“Practice is calling…”

Instantly, Harry moves closer to the wall, giving Louis more space to pass him.

“Have fun… I guess?”, Harry says, not knowing what else to wish.

“Thanks. I’ll see you around.”

When Louis is almost throught the door to the anteroom, Harry remembers something. 

“Hey Louis, maybe call me later? So I have your number too. To let the studio know when I’m running late or something.”

Harry has to look up to Louis from where he still hasn’t moved on the stairs. Turning around to him again, Louis has the hint of a smirk on his face. 

“Will do, Harry.”

With that, he’s through the door and Harry is back on his mission to get Lilly home safely. The air is coldish when they step outside and the sun is setting, but Harry feels like golden hour still isn’t over yet. 

Later that night, a strange number texts him. 

**Louis: Hi, this is Louis from the dance studio.**

For a few minutes, Harry’s unsure whether to answer or not. In the end, he decides to fuck it and just types something casual. 

**Harry: Hi, Louis from the dance studio. Practice good? :)**

**Louis: Yup. And no one even needed an ice pack because of me**

**Harry: Stop ittttt, it was an accident :(**

**Louis: ;)**

  
After that, the conversation is over. Even Harry knows that it’s kind of over the top to keep annoying someone when they just sent an emoji, so he just lets it go. Maybe, hopefully, Louis would text him again in the near future? Or he’d have a reason to text maybe. Perheps he would be late to pick up Lilly, who knows? Well, after he had James convinced to let him pick up Lilly again.

  
-

  
Originally Harry considered going home to visit his family this weekend but doesn’t in the end. It’s not like he’s absolutely drowning in uni work or anything, he’s just having one of these phases where he feels like he needs to get a grip on his life. Catch up with everything and study ahead, excercise, grocery shopping and cleaning, maybe even cooking. Also, have one or two minor life crisis probably. Basically all the things that make Harry feel like he’s _adulting_. 

On Saturday morning, Harry sets an alarm for 7am to go on a morning jog. After hitting snooze the fifth time, he’s still in bed and regrets the day Apple added the alarm clock feature. The green smoothie he tries to prepare ahead so he wouldn’t have to worry about it after his jog smells like… meh. It screams healthy though and that’s totally what Harry is going for. 

He hates every second of his jog and he’s not even trying to deny it. 

On Monday during his lecture, he ends up googling sports clubs in the area. When he was younger he used to play both football and badminton and maybe this is a good time to start social interaction and excercising. 

Another week and a few emails to a badminton coach later, he finds himself in the gym changing room, his old badminton racket that he brought to Leeds when he moved here but wasn’t sure he’d ever use sticking out of his sports bag. 

He is nervous as hell before he steps out of the changing room, acutely aware that he himself wasn’t always a fan when someone new had joined his teams, shaking up the already established dynamic a little. 

One and a half hours later, he steps back into the changing room with his water bottle clutched between his sweaty hands, drinking the last sip in one go. In hindsight, it wasn’t necessary to work himself up like that before the practice. It’s a mixed group of mostly university aged people, most of them friendly and aware that it’s mainly for fun. 

Harry teams up with a boy a couple inches shorter than him whose regular partner didn’t turn up today and when it’s time to play double the last half hour, they make quite a good team. 

  
-

  
“Hi love, how are you?“, Harry’s mum accepts the phone call just mere seconds after he clicked on her contact. Sometimes he feels guilty that his calls home lessen the time more time passes since he’s moved out. 

“Hi mum. I’m good. What about you?” 

They catch up on everything that’s happened in the past one and a half weeks, in Leeds and at home. How Harry’s mum cut the lawn two days ago, how Dusty is doing (Harry misses Dusty a lot), how uni is going and that Harry went to badminton. 

“Oh that sounds good! I’m glad you’re settling in well.”

“Yeah. Yeah. I think it was a good decision to come here for my masters.” It’s the first time Harry says it out loud. Admits it. He did have his doubts in the beginning, but he has James now and he gets along with his flatmate and he likes most of his classes. 

“I’m glad to hear that, baby”, his mum responds and it sounds like she’s smiling. Harry knows she’s been worrying about him, especially because of the struggles Harry went through when he started his bachelors. 

“Jane and Robert were here yesterday, asking what you’re up to, how uni is going, if you’ve been seeing anyone…”

Aunt Jane had always tended to be rather nosey. Harry loves her but the moment you tell her gossip or even personal news, the whole family knows, the neighbourhood knows, the women in her bowling club know and probably also their doctor’s assitants. 

It’s not like Harry doesn’t pick up on the underswelling question. _Are you seeing someone?_  
His mum has enough sense of privacy to not ask it directly though. She wouldn’t get an answer anyway. Harry does have a good relationship with his mum, his whole family really, he just doesn’t feel the need to fill them in about every date he’s going on or every person he’s currently fancying. 

“I’ll make sure to text her soon. Or maybe call her when she’s at grandma’s“, is all Harry says to ditch the topic. 

The day Harry came home with his first boyfriend no one was really surprised. It was shortly after graduation before he took off to uni and he had drifted towards a friend group other than his high school friends. It hadn’t lasted very long for many reasons but looking back, Harry was kind of glad he had gotten over the whole coming out so easily. He was also thankful for the opportunity to leave home just a few weeks later. 

Ever since, his family had been kind of expecting him to introduce someone new at some point, being at uni and all. Harry doesn’t even want to think about it. He’d never clarified whether he was gay or bi or pan or if this was perhaps just a phase. He also doesn’t fucking know. 

  
-

  
The next week, Harry goes to badminton again. His partner from last time is already playing with someone else, so Harry waits to see who’s still looking for a partner. A tall girl called Taylor it is, this time. 

He can see himself here regurarly, he thinks by the end of their one and a half hours.

“Mate, please tell me how gay his fucking leggings are”, a boy around Harry’s height says when he enters the changing room. Either he isn’t bothered by anyone hearing his comment or he doesn’t think it was loud enough.

The boy standing next to him, easily half a head taller than Harry and way more intimidating (as intimidating as badminton players can be), snorts and agrees. 

“Duh, not just the leggings. The wrist says it all.”

They laugh and continue gossiping while Harry stays quiet in his corner, changing quickly. He guesses they’re talking about one of the younger boys in their group, possibly a first year, who wore one of these leggings today that some runners wear under shorts. 

Later that night, after consulting google, Harry first learns about a stereotype called “gay wrists”. If he keeps his hands and wrists extra tense from that night on, that’s definitely not on purpose. 

-

“So. I think I was right.”

James and Harry are once again on their way to pick up Lilly from dancing. It doesn’t even need much of convincing James at this point. Harry just announces “I’m tagging along today” and that’s that. 

“Hm? About what?”, Harry asks, kicking a small stone ouf his way for the fourth time. 

“Lilly told me you asked Louis to call you.”

That has Harry turn his head to look at his friend, who’s smirking like the sly arsehole he is. Instead of denying it, he tries to talk it down. 

“You were right then too. She is a little snitch.”

James laughs and zips up his jacket higher when a cold breeze hits them. No more endless golden hour this far into November. 

“While that’s very true indeed, you’re distracting from the tea. Let’s have some tea!”

“There’s no tea. No warm tea at least. It’s basically iced tea. Louis and I exchanged numbers, yeah, but only for business concerns. I’m listed as one of Lilly’s contacts now apparently, in case something happens at dancing.”

James’ humming indicates how little he’s buying Harry’s business-only-intentions.

“I didn’t ask him to _call me up_ or anything. Did ask him to text me his number, but only so I could call if I’m, like, late or anything. When I’m picking up Lilly“, Harry feels the need to clarfiy. Digging himself in deeper, more like. 

“I’m sure that’s all it’s about.” The sarcasm in James’ voice is dripping and it makes the corners of Harry’s mouth turn up too. He feels like he’s thirteen again, hastily denying his crush as his friends keep teasing him about how he’s blushing. 

“It is.”

“Mh.”

They cross the street and Harry’s familiar with the streets now, so much that he can’t understand how he got lost once. Suddenly a thought pops up in his mind. 

“Wait, wait, wait”, he says and actually stops walking. “You said _fiancée_!”

“Mh?”, James hums as if he doesn’t know what Harry is talking about, but the recurring smirk on his face says differently.

“In research methods! I totally forgot about it until now but you said your _fiancée_ was in an accident. You got engaged, you dog!”

“Yup”, James confirms. He definitely does look happy, so Harry is happy for him too.

Bumping his shoulder into James’, he congratulates his friend and begs for all the details that had been so rudely withheld from him all these weeks. 

“Sorry, I wanted to tell you the day after Cassie’s accident but then so much happened all at once and it just kind of drowned in the mess.“

Harry reassures him it’s fine, that he’s still happy for them and definitely awaiting a wedding invitation, even when James tells him that Cassie and him agreed to wait until after James’ graduation. 

“Just didn’t feel right to wait another one and a half years until proposing”, James shrugs his shoulder. Harry awws at him. 

They’re only one street and one turn right from the dance studio, when Harry gathers enough courage to start talking again. 

“Hey, James?”

“Yes, dear Harry?”

“Theoretically, like, totally hypothetically - could you maybe ask Liam if, like… if Louis is potentially single … and into men?”

“I knew it!”, James basically screams in his face. “I knew it. _Only for business-concerns_ , my ass.”

“Ugh, stop it. Seriously though, could you? I know it’s like super awkward because he’s Lilly’s coach and stuff. But you hung out with him a few days back, right? Just like, say it’s for a friend?” Harry can’t even believe he suggests that. Dear lord does it sound desperate. Does he even really want this?

“Mate, I can ask if he’s single - which is most likely going to be weird, not gonna lie - but bro, in my opinion that boy is _definitely_ not straight”, James says as they cross the street for the last time, heading straight for their destination. 

_Based on what_ , Harry wants to scream. _Based on fucking stereotypes._  
He doesn’t though, because James doesn’t mean to be offending and he might actually proof to be a helpful negotiator in Harry’s matter of concern. 

“I just don’t want to make a fool out of myself”, Harry defends himself quietly when they’re pushing open the glass door, exemplary punctual of course. 

“No worries, I’ll work my wonders”, James promises with a suggestive wink. 

They climb the stairs in silence, but the background noise in the stair case is insane anyways, the kids seemingly having just been released. There’s parents calling for their children and girls screeching about whatever it is girl their ages screech about, forgetting to control their indoor voices. 

James heads for the anteroom, dodging some people on the way. Liam’s talking to a mum who’s daughter is trying to hang from the door handle before she gets scolded for it. 

The stream of children coming from the studio subsides and Lilly comes skipping towards her dad, who greets her with a smile and sends her off to Harry so he can put on her jacket.

It’s a super awkward feeling, dressing Lilly up for the chilly November weather outside while ten feet away, his friend is trying to set him up with Lilly’s coach’s friend. Who could totally turn up at any second and hear James and oh god, this is all so stupid. 

He distinctily hears James and Liam chatting about today’s practice until James not so tactfully changes the topic. 

“So, about your friend Louis.”

Liam looks at him funnily for a split second, but responds politely nonetheless.

“Yeah, what about him?”

“Do you know if he’s single? Asking for a friend”, James laughs. Harry bends down even further to re-tie Lilly’s shoes even though the bow he’s tied before was perfectly fine. Fuck, this is some embarrassing shit. He should’ve just waited outside the building. A street away, maybe, so he wouldn’t see Louis pulling up either. 

Liam’s face still has confused written all over it. “Uh.”

“A male friend”, James adds and from his point of view Harry can’t determine whether he makes an inconspicuous gesture in his direction, but no matter why, Liam’s eyes fall on him. He’s silent for a second before a slight grin spreads across face. 

“Actually, wait a second. Let’s just ask him. Louis! Come here for a second.” 

Louis is here. In the studio, most likely. He’s been here the whole time. 

Oh my fucking god no - 

“Hey”, Louis nods to greet James when he joins the two of them. “What’s up?”

Harry’s not sure if Louis has spotted him yet where he’s crouching down so much to make himself invisible, it should be rewarded with an olympic medal. He’s trying very hard to keep Lilly occupied and not risk her running off to James because then he’d have to get up as well and he definitely doesn’t want to join the conversation. 

“James here is asking if you’re single.”

Louis looks just a tiny bit weirded out before James amusedly adds ”Asking for a friend. He’d like to know.”

Louis’ eyes flicker to where Harry and Lilly are talking about the latest episode of some kid’s show Harry’s never even seen before. Well, Lilly is talking and Harry is half-heartedly contributing contentless comments. 

This has taken a turn from embarrassing to almost humiliating way too quickly. He should’ve stayed in bed today, for god’s sake. 

“Yeah, I am. Single, that is. But say, is there possibly a chance that your friend could talk to me himself?”

Harry squints his eyes shut as if that would make everything around him go away. 

It’s obvious Louis understands who this whole scene is about. 

“He’s quite shy actually, but we can still try”, James offers. “Lilly!”

Lilly is up and next to her dad in seconds, like a well trained dog (Harry promises himself to never compare a child to a trained dog again). 

Also, fuck you James. 

He keeps his position for a few more seconds before he slowly stands up straight and lets his legs get used to being reconnected to his blood circulation. When he cracks the bones in his back to release some tension, Louis is suddenly next to him. 

“Hi.”

“Hi”, Harry greets back, having no other choice but to make eye contact. 

“So… I hear someone’s interested?”

The glint in his eyes is making Harry go insane. He pulls a face in embarrassment. He did not think this all through. 

“Yeah. Sorry.”

Louis’ hands are buried in the adidas trackies he’s wearing (sadly not the dark blue ones, still looks good on him though) and he looks deeply relaxed. 

“Nothing to be sorry for, love.”

Love. 

“Uh yeah.”

Louis looks up at him, his eyes squinted the slightest bit as if he’s trying to figure out what’s going on behind Harry’s furrowed brows. 

“So?”, he inquires. 

“So?”, Harry repeats dumbly. 

“I am single.”

“Cool.” 

Cool, oh my god Harry, get a fucking grip. Harry’s eyes skip over to James in search of help. He doesn’t get any though, because James and Liam watching him and Louis like proud matchmakers is definitely not helpful at all. 

“So?”

“Do you maybe wanna go grab some coffee sometime?” Well, it’s not brilliant, but a start. 

What’s brilliant though is Louis’ smile as an answer. He’s swiping the fringe out of his eyes and Harry’s probably whipped. 

“Mh, nah.”

_Ouch._

Harry doesn’t let out an indignant “What?” or “Excuse you?”, he just stares. 

“I’m just taking the piss”, Louis laughs. “I’ll go on a date with you. But we’re not going for coffee, that’s mainstream.”

A date. Harry’s neurons are overwhelmed with everything that’s happening right now. He’s letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“Alright.”

“Alright. Text me after practice, yeah?”

“Will do.”

They’re both smiling at each other like they’re teenage crushes who have just admitted that yes, they do have a crush on each other, before Louis decides he should probably get his arse in the studio to not miss the warm up. 

He swears he hears James and Liam quietly cheering when they stroll over, Louis going inside with Liam and Harry following James and Lilly outside. 

“Fuck you, James Corden”, Harry says when the glass door closes behind them. 

James fakes a scandalised noise before he breaks out in a laugh. “Excuse you, children’s ears in reach.”

Harry feels almost guilty. Almost. 

“And I just got you a date”, James sing-songs. 

Lilly snitches on Harry cursing as soon as Cassie is in hearing range. 

-

**Harry: Hey :)**

It’s taken Harry longer than he’d admit to settle on what to text Louis. Unfortunately he doesn’t know when his practice is over so he tortures himself a few more minutes, not wanting to seem desperate. 

**Louis: Hola**

**Harry: So no coffee?**

**Louis: Nope. Be creative**

**Harry: Food okay tho?**

When Louis doesn’t answer in the next two minutes and Harry is already on his second website googling for date ideas, he just kind of gives up. _A date_. The last thing he wants is to disappoint Louis with their first date already. 

**Harry: cant you just decide? :(**

**Louis: The judge has just settled on pizza. Complaints must be filed now or you shall remain silent forever**

**Harry: How is pizza more creative than coffee? :D**

**Harry: I’m up for it tho**

**Louis: do you like pizza?**

**Harry: Yeeah?**

**Louis: See, it’s settled. Maybe I don’t like coffee, have you thought of that?**

While Harry usually tries to not overdo it with emojis, Louis seems to use none at all. Which is kind of unsettling to Harry, he definitely prefers it when people use an emoji at least once in a while. It’s easier to figure out their mood then. 

**Harry: you dont like coffee?**

**Louis: Im a convinced tea drinker**

**Harry: Okay you heathen. :P Where and when?**

**Louis: Pizzeria Luigi, tmrrw 7pm?**

**Harry: works for me :)**

**Louis: Its a date then :)**

  
Harry definitely feels squirmy inside. 

  
At 6pm, when Harry is standing all dressed up (casually, but dressed up) in front of the hallway mirror of his flat, fixing his hair, his flatmate Josh is headed for the kitchen, stopping as soon as he sees Harry. 

“Date night?”

“Yup.”

“Nice! I’ll try to not walk into her when she’s doing the walk of shame tomorrow morning then”, Josh says and winks suggestively. 

Harry grimaces. He doesn’t even know exactly why, maybe because his flatmate is expecting him to bring home a _girl_ or maybe because he doesn’t allow himself to think about where this date with Louis might be headed.   


  
-

The date goes off without a hitch. While it surely is kind of awkward to meet someone in front of a pizzera for a first date, especially if you’ve only ever seen that person in one specific context, Louis’ humour is guaranteed to prevent uncomfortable silence.   
He’s the complete opposite of his texting behaviour and Harry is more than happy about it. 

“During exam season I’m quite the regular here, I’m honestly offended they won’t change the name to Louigi”, he jokes after they ordered their food. 

Altogether, it’s a good evening. Louis is funny and open (and loud) and also very good looking. Harry is a little bit shocked to see his legs in black skinnies but it only takes him a second to get a grip. It’s probably a good thing they’re sitting across from each other and Louis’ legs are not visible, hidden away under the table. 

In hindsight, there is no need to be worried about how this date is going to end. Louis makes it obvious that this is meant to be a chill evening to hang out and have a good time, not a rushed opportunity to get laid. For a second Harry wonders if Louis is always like that, taking it slow. 

Louis and Harry are walking to the bus station, both headed for the same direction, bumping shoulders too often for it to be coincidental. There are goofy smiles plastered on their faces and it feels nice, like Harry could get used to it. 

Just about twentyfour hours later, Harry does something while severly drunk and for Harry, that never turns out to be a good idea. That something being texting Louis. 

**Harry: I’am nott gay bytw**

It’s 2:44am, the speakers threatening to burst thanks to the bass and there’s no end in sight. Josh had convinced him just this evening to tag along to the flat party they’re at, someone who Josh doesn’t even know personally but someone from his class is throwing it and no one really caring how many plus ones you bring. They bring vodka as a present to the unknown host and end up drinking most of it themselves and while Harry spites the taste, it gets him going quickly. Harry doesn’t even know why he agreed to come along. Right now though, he doesn’t care. 

**Louis: sure. are you always that nervous to ask out boys to platonic dates then ?**

**Harry: nooo**

**Louis: are you drunk?**

**Harry: yessmybe im no gy tho like yuo are**

**Harry: yure waaay more mor gay thn i**

Unsurprisingly, Harry feels like shit when he wakes up on the next morning. Well, afternoon. His head is thumping like a ticking bomb and his mouth feels horribly dry and tastes of disgusting alcoholic beverages and he isn’t sure what happened yesterday night and what didn’t. 

His horror only intensifies when he checks his phone with his eyes squinted shut as much as possible. 

Oh god, he’d texted Louis.

  
**Harry: I’m so sorry for what i said last night. I was pretty drunk. Please don’t be mad at me**

**Louis: What exactly are you apologising for?**

**Harry: Everything? I dont know**

**Louis: It’s no secret I’m gay, bi if you must know. It’s your thing to figure out what you want. I don’t think this makes any sense right now.**

**Harry: Fuck I’m really really sorry, I fucked up.**

  
Louis doesn’t reply to Harry’s message and honestly, Harry doesn’t expect him to.

It’s kind of funny, how he goes from a perfectly fine date, with perspective of further development, to this. To cowardly texting someone while hammered, just because his drunk mind is always doubting things. It’s like his brain is living a seperate life when Harry’s had alcohol, overthinking and questioning himself and occasionally ruining stuff. 

And the worst thing about it - he doesn’t even know why. It’s been many, many years since he’s figured out that he’s not straight. Still, last night happened and what he texted Louis is true: he doesn’t freaking know. It’s infuriating. 

He doesn’t know why he texted Louis that he’s not gay while he’s obviously feeling differently. He tells himself he also doesn’t know why he went on a date with Louis in the first place, but that’s not true. He did it because Louis is _interesting_ and Harry is interested. 

He texts James that he’s accompanying him on Thursday to pick up Lilly. James just sends a thumbs up back. 

Harry wishes he could say that the days until said day pass by in a blur, but they don’t. It’s all one big confusing mess and Harry wants it cleared. 

It’s inconvenient that they’re late because Louis could already be inside the studio, hiding from Harry, getting ready for practice without a chance to talk to him. 

As it turns out, Louis isn’t here yet. Liam tells him as much without Harry needing to ask, as if he’s sensing that Harry is looking for him. They hang around a few more minutes, Liam obviously willing to make this less uncomfortable for everyone involved and making effort to keep up a conversation. 

There’s only so much he can do before he needs to get inside and warm up and Harry knows that, so after a few more minutes, he thanks him with a tight smile and follows James and Lilly downstairs. 

The three of them are almost at the door, ready to face the cold weather outside, when someone rips it open in a haste. 

“Oh”, Louis says instead of apologising that he almost knocked over James. 

“Hi Louis!“, Lilly greets him and Louis manages a genuine smile when he asks her about practice and mirrors her excitement. 

“Come on Lilly, we’ll go outside. Louis has practice now”, James ushers her out shortly after and shoots Harry an encouraging glance. Harry hasn’t told him what went down, but maybe he can sense the tension. 

“Hi”, Harry offers as soon as the door falls closed behind his friend. 

“Hello.”

Louis looks as good as always, back in his blue trackies, mustering him with a neutral face.

“Can we talk?” Harry’s tone is hopeful and Louis shuts it down immediately.

“No.”

“Please? I’m sorry, it’s all -”

Is this what it feels like when you’re in a fight with your boyfriend and trying to apologise? Harry still doesn’t know what he’s saying sorry for, but he just wants to have a talk with Louis. 

“Listen, Harry, I’ve got practice now, I’m already late.”

Harry bites his lip. “Okay. Sorry for bothering you”, he says and steps aside so Louis can climb the stairs. 

James definitely notices Harry’s silence on the way home but decides to not bring it up, which Harry is thankful for. He doesn’t feel like explaining.

**Louis: We can meet up next week friday, if you’re free**

Harry almost doesn’t believe his eyes when he sees Louis’ text message later that evening when his laptop is propped up on his legs and a hot chocolate in his hand is threatening to spill on his bed. 

**Harry: Yes I’m free. Thanks for texting. Place and time?**

It’s five minutes to five and Harry made sure to be more than punctual. They agreed on meeting next to the church, maybe have a sit down somewhere. 

Louis strolls towards him with confident steps, hands gripping the backpack straps on his shoulders. He’s back in his black skinnies and black Vans. Harry doesn’t know how he does it but he makes the most mainstream outfits look not mainstream.

“Hey”, Louis says and offers a slight smile. 

“Hey”, Harry replies and returns the smile. 

“Are you in the mood for some fish and chips? There’s a shop right there around the corner, I went there with Zayn a few months ago.”

Harry isn’t really keen on fish and chips right now, but Louis is not only suggesting food but also trying to break the tension, so Harry finds himself agreeing. 

The way to the shop is mostly quiet, just some smalltalk about uni and the weather and the way to their meet-up spot. They have to wait a few minutes before they get their orders and Harry is grateful that Louis doesn’t even consider sitting down in the packed little shop. 

“Let’s walk that way. Lovell’s Park is not far from here.”

Once again, Harry is glad that Louis is taking the lead. They keep walking for a few minutes, not really able to focus on enjoying their food until they find a free bench.

“So”, Harry starts, wanting to break the silence, “I’m sorry for this mess.”

Louis keeps chewing for a second, swallowing before he answers. 

“Honestly, I feel pretty stupid in this too. Like I’m overreacting when I have no reason to.”

“I am gay.”

Louis turns to face him at that, sitting back a bit from where he was hunched over his fish and chips. 

“Okay.”

“I mean it. I don’t know why I texted you that I weren’t, honestly. I … I do loads of stupid shit when I’m drunk. I really am sorry.”

It takes Louis a second to react, but eventually he kicks the backpack resting between his feet to the right and leans back against the bench rest. 

“See, I don’t even have a right to be mad at you even if you are. Not gay, I mean. Because that’s totally fair. It’s okay to figure out it’s not for you.”

He fumbles with the abandoned chips and lets his head fall back to release the tension in his neck. It’s obvious he still has something to add, so Harry opts to stay quiet.

“It’s just - I don’t want to be an experiment, you know? I don’t want to get all involved and then have you tell me you’re not gay, you know? It’s totally fair and valid that people need to figure out what they want. I’ve just been the help to figure it out often enough by now.”  
It makes Harry feel squirmy inside again. Louis makes it sound like he could imagine something more with Harry.

“I’m sorry”, Harry says and when he looks over, Louis and him lock eyes for a second. His eyes are a shining blue and it suits his striking appearance. 

“You sure apologise a lot”, Louis chuckles and turns his face to watch a dog and its owner a few feet away. “It’s okay. I just don’t want to get my hopes up with someone and then have them fuck off with some bird because being gay is not for them. And drunk people usually tell the truth, so I figured I’ve got my answer.”

“Well, I’m not sure about drunk people telling the truth because I do talk some shit when I’m pissed. But I’ve had a boyfriend before and I - I don’t even know why I texted it. I really don’t know. Like, I don’t have an explanation why I did it. It’s not like I’m in denial or anything.”

Louis nods. “Alright. So you’re saying?”

“I’m saying that I had fun last Friday and I wouldn’t mind another Friday like that.”

Harry doesn’t mention the word date on purpose, in case he blew his chance already. The last thing he needs is to make a desperate fool out of himself. Louis stares at him for a second, in a questioning way. 

“Are you sure? It’s okay if you need more time to like, be sure or anything.”

“No, I’m pretty sure that’s what I want.” Harry shoots him a smile and fumbles with the empty cardboard container in his hand. “And I promise I won’t text you the opposite tomorrow night.”

Louis chuckles and stands up abruptly, reaching out a hand as an offer to throw his rubbish away too. 

“Then let’s make this Friday another Friday like that.”

“How do you mean?”, Harry asks as his eyes follow Louis to the rubbish bin across the path. 

“Wanna go bowling?” 

Louis buries his hands in the pockets of his jacket. It’s freezing. Well, not really, but it feels like it after having sat down in the cold for as long as they have. 

“Right now?” Harry seems surprised but gets up nonetheless. His feet are close to turning numb and his nose is red like Rudolph’s. Louis shrugs casually. 

“Sure. No time like the present, and all that.”

“Okay”, Harry agrees slightly hesitantly but unable to keep the excitment off his face. It seems he’s not only good at ruining things in record time, but sometimes they turn back to good just as fast. 

The walk to the bowling alley is more informative and maybe even more fun than their previous date. Harry learns more about Louis’ interests of any kind - he’s doing his master in physics (physics of all the things one could be studying), he’s particularly interested in the medical side of physics and can’t wait to take the class X-ray Computed Tomography in his second semester, he blames his interest in physics on having watched a lot of science shows for kids. He talks about living with his flatmate Zayn and how he and his friends meet up to play a round of footie whenever possible.   
Harry quickly decides that Louis is not only adorable, but also admirably smart. 

“My friend Eleanor works at the bowling alley”, Louis explains when Harry voices concerns that they might not be able to get a lane. It’s a Friday evening after all. “I texted her when we left the park and she said she’d block us a lane.”

The bowling alley is in the basement of building that Harry hasn’t ever actively noticed. Louis leads the way, obviously knowing the way, probably having been here before multiple times. 

“Hi El”, he greets his friend who leans over the counter she’s standing behind to hug him. Her long brown hair is wavey and she’s wearing a white polo shirt that’s most likely mandatory. 

“Hi Lou, how’s it going?” 

“Good, good. Thanks for blocking the lane.”

For a second, Harry is jealous of her. It’s unreasonable because Louis said they were friends and they’re actually kind of an a second date right now (are they?), but she’s pretty nonetheless and he vividly remembers Louis’ text saying he was bi.

His moment of impolite thoughts is interrupted when Eleanor turns to him, a warm smile greeting him while she holds out a hand. 

“I’m Eleanor.”

“Harry, hi”, he replies and focuses on shaking her delicate hand. Harry wonders if you need to be good at bowling in order to be allowed to work here. 

“Follow me, you’re on lane three”, Eleanor explains and walks off towards the lanes after handing them shoes in their sizes. There must be at least fifteen lanes and Harry is kind of glad they’re not on one of the middle ones where everyone from both sides could watch them. And also judge his lack of bowling skills. 

“Do you already know how long you’re going to stay? I booked two hours for now, but I can still change it now.”

Louis checks in with Harry before deciding that they’ll do two hours and just leave early in case they get bored. Eleanor nods and takes their orders for drinks, delivering them just a minute later. 

“I’m not really good at bowling, to be honest”, Harry confesses as he watches Louis carry over some bowling balls from other lanes, checking the weight. “Pretty bad actually.”

Louis smirks at him while weighing a ball in his hand, stroking over the metallic green surface. 

“Good. I like to win.”

As it turns out, Harry is indeed _pretty bad_ at bowling. He envies Louis and his professional technique and how he manages to let go of the ball exactly the right time so it doesn’t make a loud noise when it hits the ground. 

Louis makes a show of flinching whenever Harry basically drops the ball and it rolls straight into the gutter. Embarrassed but being able to joke about it, Harry turns around and shoves Louis lightly with his shoulder as he plops down on the small couch.

“Heeey. I used to be way worse. My first time bowling was in France when I was on exchange. I was like 15 and everyone knew how to bowl except for me and I dropped the ball from like, waist height and it was super loud and half of the alley was staring at me. I was super scared it’d left a dent in the wood.”

“Did it?”, Louis laughs, looking at him in a way that could probably be described as fondly. Harry revels in it. 

“No, thank god no.”

They play a few rounds, Louis getting as many strikes as Harry’s balls end up in the gutter. When Eleanor comes to check on them and their drinks, they order another round and only decide to take a little break after Louis has won three times. 

It’s not like in the movies. Harry does have a lot of fun despite being horrible, but Louis doesn’t grab his hips to demonstrate where they’re supposed to point. Sure, he does try to help Harry, giving him tips and repeating the sequence of movements multiple times when it’s too quick for Harry to catch up. But in the end, Louis does keep decent distance and Harry doesn’t mind, considering all these people filling up the bowling alley the later it gets. 

“She’s my duet partner”, Louis says when they’re both sitting down and sipping their cokes. 

“Hm?”

“Eleanor. We dance duets together.”

Harry puts down his glass on his knee, the condensation causing little troplets to drop on his jeans. 

“I thought you’re in that group with Liam?”

Louis nods and wipes his fringe out of his eyes. It’s a habit Harry has obvserved many times today. 

“I am. Our formation practices on Thursday, after Liam’s kids. That’s where you’ve seen me before. But I also do duets with Eleanor. We practice on Tuesdays.”

“Cool”, Harry comments. After a few seconds he decides to add “I’m sorry, I don’t really know anything about dancing”, in order to not come off as rude. 

“I figured. I can tell you a bit, if you want to hear it?”

Honestly, dancing obviously isn’t one of Harry’s favourite sports and he definitely doesn’t have a keen interest in it, but he wants Louis to keep talking. He’s not taking the risk of creating awkward silence. 

“Sure, go ahead.”

“So, do you know what kind of dancing it is that we’re doing?”

Harry knows James told him Lilly does Contemporary, if he remembers correctly, so he guesses that’s what Louis does too. 

“Yeah, Contemporary. It’s pretty much a mixture of a few genres, like jazz and modern and ballet. It’s very different from like, couple dancing, but I’m guessing you know that.”

Harry nods. He doesn’t know shit but he can distinguish Tango from Contemporary. 

“You don’t really need a fixed number of dancers for Contemporary”, Louis continues. “Like, you can dance solo or in a group of twenty, whatever you prefer.”

“Do you do solo as well?”, Harry asks. 

“Not really, no. On Wednesdays, the studio is open for free practice so everyone who feels like it kinda pops by and practices whatever they want. Sometimes I do some solo stuff there when El’s not around.”

“Is she in your group too?” Harry doesn’t remember from the two times he’s taken a look into the studio. 

“Nah”, Louis shakes his head. “She doesn’t do formation. In the beginning she had to work Thursday evenings but I’m pretty sure she could get off now, she just doesn’t want to. And that’s fine.”

They keep talking about dancing a little while longer while returning to bowling - how Louis first got around to it, how he found the studio when he moved to Leeds for uni, how he finds the time for it during exam season - before Louis turns to look at him more seriously. 

“We do a _Dance Into Christmas_ every year. It’s like, a christmas show for all the dancers in our studio. We don’t take part in actual competitions, at least not as of now, so it’s nice to perform in front of audience every once in a while. Especially for the kids. We’ve been practicing for it since summer, so if you’re interested, you could come.”

Before Harry can reconsider, he already agrees. “Cool, yeah”, he smiles at Louis, who mirrors his facial expression. 

“Where is it though? Like, the studio is a tad too small for a christmas show, isn’t it?”

It takes a second for Louis to answer because he’s busy showing off with another strike, turning around with a satisfied grin. Harry doesn’t even want to look at the screen to check the score difference. 

“Yeah that’d be a pretty tight fit, but we rent a local theatre for the night. It’s just a street from the studio.”

“Text me the details and I’ll try to be there”, Harry says and means it. 

  
When they exit the bowling alley, it’s already dark outside due to the days getting shorter the closer they get to the end of the year. They have to walk a bit before they find a bus station of their bus line and then some more before the bus arrives. 

It’s only a couple minutes before Harry announces that the next one is his stop and he internally prepares for the night to end right here, in the bus, with all the strangers watching him say goodbye. Louis on the other hand has other plans, saying he’ll get off with Harry and walk the rest home, that it’s only a short walk and he enjoys a bit of night air. Harry doesn’t object. 

“So, did you like this _another Friday_?”, Louis inquires when they’re sauntering towards Harry’s flat. 

“I did, thanks. For giving this a chance, too.”

“Don’t make me regret that decision, Harold”, Louis chuckles but somewhere deep inside, he probably means it. 

“I’ll try not to.”

They stop in front of Harry’s building and Harry nods up to the second floor. “I live up there.”

“Well then, have a good night and don’t drink too much”, Louis says, letting his gaze wander from the window that could be Harry’s to Harry’s face. He’s a few inches shorter than Harry and bends his head slightly upwards to meet Harry’s eyes. There’s still a fair distance between them and Harry’s unsure what to do about it. 

“I know my limits. Most of the time at least.” It feels like he’s artificially stretching this conversation, but he doesn’t mind. It’s some intense shit to end a date in front of your flat and not know how to part. 

Louis makes that decision for him. 

“Can I?” There’s no doubt what Louis is asking. “Or is that too rushed?”

Harry just nods to answer Louis’ first question and lowers his head a little to lessen the distance between their faces. It’s Louis who closes the last bit. 

Louis’ lips are as soft as his fringe looks and it’s a sensation Harry hasn’t felt in quite a while. The kiss is chaste and only lasts a few seconds, not intended to turn dirty, but Harry already craves more. There’s no sparks exploding, but Harry is also too busy thinking _Oh my god oh my god_ to notice if there were sparks or a firework or a marching band. 

Kissing Louis isn’t much different from kissing a girl. His face is clean shaven and soft, no stubble. Harry’s fingertips of his right hand touch Louis’ cheek carefully. Half of him doesn’t know what else to do with his useless arms dangling around, half of him already knows deep inside he wants to grab the back of Louis’ head tightly and deepen the kiss. 

The bowling part might not have been the movie cliche then, but this probably counts. 

Louis lowers his hands that had been ghosting over Harry’s neck when he pulls back to break the kiss. Harry hadn’t even noticed them sneaking up. 

There’s a question written over Louis’ face. _Okay?_ Harry slightly nods again, hopefully stopping the caution Louis can’t seem to get over. 

“I should probably go soon”, Louis sighs after a few more seconds of intense staring. 

“Okay.“

“Bye”, Louis says with a dopey grin, goes on his tippy toes to peck Harry’s lips shortly and then turn around to head home. Harry watches him until he disappears around the corner. 

  
After that night they fall into an easy routine, more or less. They don’t throw themselves into some intense codependency or anything, but they text regurlarly, sometimes flirt. 

Sadly, Louis is pretty booked out which makes it difficult to meet up as much as they’d like. Whenever he isn’t at uni, studying at home, or at the studio, he’s working as a waiter in a café downtown more hours a week than Harry probably sleeps. 

The next weekend Louis is going home to visit his family and it sounds pretty important so no chance there either. The only opportunity Harry sees right now is once again the weekly Lilly pick-up, so he’s taking it. 

-

“Hey”, Harry says as Louis strolls towards him, already dressed in shorts but still wearing an adidas hoodie. 

“Hi”, Louis smiles up to him and hugs him with one arm, but still tightly, not like a stranger at a party that you don’t really want to hug. 

“Uh.” Suddenly it’s like Harry has lost the sentence he was trying to transfer from his head to his mouth.

“Uh”, Louis mimics with a grin. He’s hiding his hands inside the hoodie’s pockets and he looks endlessly comfortable, especially with his hair soft like this. But time is rare and Harry is not here to stand and admire Louis. At least not right now.

“I wanted to ask if you’re free this weekend? Maybe Saturday, for a change?“

Louis bites his lips and looks to the left upper corner as if he’s mentally going through his calender. 

“I’ve got to work on Satuday, sorry. Is Friday okay? Or are you getting tired of our Friday dates?”

It’s a stupid question, because the answer is definitely no. Harry moves his feet restlessly and checks quickly that Lilly and James aren’t impatiently waiting already. 

“No, Friday’s good. I’ve uni until 12, but that shouldn’t be a problem.”

Louis squints his eyes a little when he looks up to make eye contact. It’s quite intense, having all of his attention on him. 

“Tell you what, I’ll pick you up from uni and we’ll grab something to eat. Sound good?”

Harry only hesitates for a second before he agrees. Originally he’d hoped he’d be able to keep Louis and uni separated for a while, but what’s it hurt. 

“Uh, sure.”

“Cool. Text me where. I’ve gotta go now…”

“Yeah, yeah, go”, Harry agrees and gestures towards the door. James is not so discreetly watching them with a creepy grin on his face. 

“See ya.” With that and a peck on his lips so quick that Harry isn’t even sure it happened, Louis is gone. 

-

  
So here Harry is, leaving the uni building on Friday noon, not wanting to spend a second more than necessary there. It’s offically weekend, for god’s sake. 

Louis has already arrived as it seems. He’s leaning against a street sign pole and shoots Harry a closed lip smile. He’s in black jeans with rips at the knees again, but red instead of his black Vans, making it hard to look elsewhere. His feet must be freezing. With big steps, Harry walks over and hugs him hello, Louis kissing his cheek in return. 

“Hi.”

“Heyo, how was your lecture?”

“Meh. It’s over now”, Harry says and cracks a smile. “Shall we?”

Louis nods and pushes himself off the pole. 

Harry is about to ask what kind of lunch Louis has in mind when two girls from his lecture are coming up to them. Cher and the other blonde girl’s name, Harry honestly doesn’t remember. Perhaps Mary. 

“Hi Harry. I just wanted to ask if you were in the law lecture on Tuesday? We both missed it and no one we know took useable notes…”, Cher rambles. 

“I can send them to you”, Harry offers before Cher can go on. He wants to groan in annoyance because he hates doing all the work and then have people bum it off him because they’re too lazy to get out of bed. But to be fair, he’d skipped class too a few weeks back and he was just as grateful when someone filled him in. 

“Thank you!”, Cher beams at him. “You have my number from the Research Methods groupchat yeah?”

“Yeah, I think.”

“Thank you, really, you’re a life saver.” Her gaze then wanders over to Louis who’s been standing next to Harry the whole time, waiting for him to finish. “Are you Harry’s boyfriend? Hi, I’m Cher”, she introduces herself with a smile and holds out her hand. 

Louis shakes her hand and is about to reply, but before he’s even got a chance, Harry already interrupts them.

“No, no, I don’t have a boyfriend, I’m no -”

Cher looks at him funnily and honestly, he can’t blame her. She withdraws her hand that was still shaking Louis’ and exchanges a confused look with her friend. 

“Uh okay, we’re, we’re going to get going. Have a great weekend!”

“Yeah, you too”, Harry mumbles and closes his eyes. When he opens them again, Louis is staring at him just like he expected. After a few seconds of uneasy silence, Louis is the one to break it. 

“What the fuck, Harry.”

“Louis -”

“No, Harry. You don’t have a boyfriend or you don’t have a _boy_ friend?”

Fuck, did Louis think they were a couple already? They hadn’t ever said they were exclusive. It’s not like Harry would go and hook up with someone else but still, it hasn’t been said out loud. 

Louis glares at him expectantly and when he can’t get any appropriate words out, turns around exasperatedly and runs his hand over his face. 

“I’m sorry”, Harry begins but is once again interrupted by Louis. 

“No, Harry, we’re not doing this shit all over again. I thought you figured out what you want? Why tell her you don’t have a boyfriend then? In that tone, especially.” He stops for a moment. “I know we’re not together. But you also didn’t make it sound like you’d ever want that to happen.” Harry almost flinches with how disgusted Louis spits out the last words. But at least it answers his question concerning their relationship status. 

“I panicked! I’m sorry.”

Louis’ face softens a bit. “It’s okay to not be out at uni - just tell me. It’s okay if you don’t want to snog right next to your uni building. But I don’t want to be denied if this is supposed to have any future.”

Inside Harry’s head, there’s so many thoughts swimming around. He wants to say something but at the same time, he doesn’t know how to do that without making everything worse. 

“Harry, you can be honest with me. Do you think you’re gay? I know you said you’ve had a boyfriend before, but that doesn’t have to mean you’re into boys right now.”

“I don’t know”, Harry says. Louis tries to cover how much it hurts to even suggest that, but Harry still sees it when he looks him in the eyes. He looks down at his shoes and the grey paving stone beneath his feet. 

“That’s okay too! You can be questioning. You don’t need to put a label on it. I just want you to be sure if you’re into boys, no matter if you’re gay or bi or whatever.”

“I am… into boys”, Harry assures him. He stands by what he said a few weeks back.   
“It’s just not always as easy for me to show it in my everyday life, you know?” He leaves out his experiences at Badminton on purpose. Louis doesn’t need to worry or rage about that. “Like, you’re a dancer. Of course it’s easy for you to be out to them.”

Louis just stares at him like a blank paper. 

“What are you saying? That me being a dancer obviously means I’m gay?”

“I mean, you can’t tell me dancing as a sport is exactly brimming with masculinity. But that’s also not the point -“

“No, is it not? What is it then, Harry? Are you afraid of me being too gay? Of your uni friends finding out? Are you ashamed to have a camp boyfriend, is that it?“ His staring isn’t neutral anymore, he’s bubbling with anger. Louis kicks the pole in annoyance, so much it’s swining and hits it afterwards, for good measure. If the few students strewn around them weren’t looking before, they probably are by now. 

“Actually, don’t answer that. I don’t care right now. Go watch some manly rugby or beat up a punching bag or whatever it is you do to feel _manly_.”  
He pulls on his backpack’s straps to move it higher up his back and turns around. He’s only a step away before he turns around once again to face Harry. 

“And get your fucking priorities straight. Or yourself, I don’t know.”

-

Over the next few days, Harry tries texting Louis thrice. The first two trials of an apology go unanswered, the third says **You blew your two chances, that’s all you get.**

And it’s kinda fair, Harry guesses. He hasn’t exactly made it easy on Louis and it seems like half of the time, Harry has been running after Louis in the attempt of apologising for fucking up once again. 

Even without the steady texting that Harry has grown more used to than he expected, the _Dance Into Christmas_ is slowly coming up. Louis had texted him the details a few days back and Harry had once again agreed to be there. 

Harry seriously considers not going, but James talks him into it even after Harry lightly scratches the topic of him and Louis not being on good terms per se right now. 

“If you don’t want to come for Louis, come and watch Lilly. She’ll love it.”

Except, the afternoon just a few hours before the dancing is supposed to happen, Harry gets a text message. 

**James: Lilly just threw up. We’re not coming tonight, sry**

**Harry: I hope she gets better soon! Say hi to Cassie and her**

**James: Hi back. Are you still going?**

**Harry: Idk**

  
In the end, Harry does go. He can’t deny wanting to see Louis dance. Maps guides him to the theatre Louis mentioned savely and he arrives a good thirty minutes before the official start. It’s kind of awkward to push open the entry door alone, without a person to talk to and mask how out of place he feels. 

Watching the dance is free, Harry learns, but he still rolls up a fiver and pushes it into the petty cash standing on a table covered with info pamphlets about dancing and the studio. The girl behind it smiles kindly and thanks him.

Harry follows the flow of parents through a door and is surprised with how big the actual theatre is. It could probably fit around fifehundred people. He looks around and hopes to not meet anyone he knows, like someone from uni. 

A lot of seats are already taken, especially the middle front rows are filled with proud parents ready to whip out the camera and film the whole thing. Harry walks to the far right and finds himself a seat where hopefully no one would sit next to him. The texture of the red upholstery is soft and Harry sinks into it with a sigh. 

His view isn’t the best, but still acceptable. He’s tall, he can see above people’s heads. 

In the attempt of passing the time until something happens, Harry scrolls through his Instagram half-heartedly, tags his sister and James in a few memes and zips through stories without paying attention to them. 

Just when he thinks he successfully defended the seat next to him so it’d stay empty the whole time, two women walk up to him.

“Hello, excuse me, is this seat tak - oh hey, Harry!”

Harry looks up and has to focus his eyes on the woman’s face for a second as the lights are already dimmed to a cosy shimmer, but he quickly recognises her dyed black hair. 

“Hey Katy.” 

He’s sat next to her in their social work law lecture before, having met and talked in fresher’s week. He doesn’t really consider her a friend, but they greet each other in the hallway and he doesn’t need to worry about her judging him for being at a dance event, obviously. 

“So is this seat free?”, she repeats with a kind smile. Harry nods frantically and scrambles up his jacket, moving it to the empty seat on his right hand side. 

“Want me to move over a seat?“, he offers. 

“No, it’s fine, it’s just the two of us. This is my sister, by the way. We’re here to watch my niece.”

He returns her smile and lets them settle in their seats. 

“Did you see the programmes?”, Katy asks and waves a paper pamphlet in his face. 

“No, where did you get that?”

“At the entrance. Here, you can have it, Angie has another one.“

Harry accepts the programme Katy holds out to him and inspects it. The front side is a stereotypical picture of Santa Claus in a sleigh and a red header reading _Dance Into Christmas_ at the top and _Dance Studio Holbeck_ at the bottom. He flicks it open and reads through the acts. 

The older the dancers the later their performance, it seems. Which makes sense, because Liam’s kids probably get tired way earlier than adults. 

_Programme_

_Collective opening dance_  
_Welcome address (Liam Payne)_

_5-8 year old - Happier (Marshmello ft. Bastille)_  
_choreographed by Liam Payne_

_8-12 year old - Human (Christina Perrie)_  
_choreographed by Perrie Edwards_

_12-16 year old - Never enough (Loren Allred)_  
_choreographed by Louis Tomlinson_

_Monday formation - Let it go (James Bay)_

_Thursday formation - River (Bishop Briggs)_

_Duo Ashton Irwin & Jesy Nelson - Almost lover (A Fine Frenzy)_

_Duo Louis Tomlinson & Eleanor Calder - My addiction (Adam French)_

_Trio Jade Thirlwall, Perrie Edwards & Leigh-Anne Pinnock - Unsteady (X Ambassadors)_

_End of the night_

_The Dance Studio Holbeck wishes you and your family a merry christmas (and happy new year)!_

  
The backside of the programme is a photograph of what’s probably last year’s Dance Into Christmas, with dozens of dancers together on stage. Involuntarily, Harry tries to spot Louis, which turns out to be quite difficult due to the photo quality. He finds him though, in the back row of all the dancers lined up, grinning like the Cheshire cat, his hands on the shoulders of the little girl standing in front of him. 

Before he gets the chance to check if he recognises anyone else in the photo, the lights dim down until it’s almost completely dark in the theatre besides the fire exit signs and stage lightning. 

Music starts playing and to Harry’s surprise, it’s a jazz version of _Jingle Bells_. From left and right, dancers of all ages start entering the stage and that’s what’s meant with _collective opening dance_ , Harry guesses. It’s quite a colourful picture, with everyone wearing different outfits depending on the group they belong to. Some girls of Liam’s group are wearing a santa hat and it’s incredibly cute. 

A lot of hip waggling is happening and the choreography doesn’t look too complex, with loads of repetitions, considering young kids need to be able to perform it as well. It’s obvious that the older dancers are trying to stay in the background and keep an eye on the kids.   
When a little girl from Liam’s group stumbles and falls, Louis is there in a nanosecond, helping her up, making sure she’s okay and encouraging her to get back in the rhythm with a smile. Harry’s heart twitches in awe. 

The song ends and the dancers keep the end poses while loud applause echoes through the theatre. Everyone is smiling widely, some kids waving their parents in the audience. 

Harry notices someone coming up to the stage and handing Liam a microphone. Of course Liam would be the one to moderate this event. 

“Good evening everyone!”, he starts after testing the mic’s volume. “Welcome to this year’s _Dance Into Christmas_! My name is Liam Payne and I’ll be providing you with a bit of information here and there throughout the evening. So those of you who don’t have a programme - dont worry, I’ll introduce every act. My fellow dancers and I are very happy that so many of you have made it here today despite the stressful pre-christmas time. Hopefully, we’ll be able to take your mind off it for a few hours tonight!”

The audience claps politely and Harry joins in. It’s impressive how smoothly Liam talks, as if he doesn’t mind sea of hundreds of eyes trained on him at all. Harry wishes he could do a presentation like that in class.

“For everyone who doesn’t know, we’re all dancing at Dance Studio Holbeck, which is about two streets from here. At this point I want to say a very big thank you to Holbeck Theatre for letting us borrow this venue once again.”

Applause again. 

“A lot of you probably recognised our first dance to Jingle Bells. Over the past couple years it’s become a beloved tradition to start the night with a collective christmas-y themed dance. But now I don’t want to keep you from what you all came here for, the dancing, any longer. We would just like to take a quick photo with all dancers together while we’re still fresh and awake.”

Someone with a massive professional camera comes up in the middle path of the theatre and takes a few pictures before everyone involved is satisfied. 

“Now, I’m happy to introduce the first dance of the evening. Which is actually my girls! We’ve been practicing two choreographies lately, but we decided to perform the literally _happier_ one tonight. I’m very proud of my group and I hope you enjoy!”

Liam switches the mic off and hands it to Louis before everyone but Liam’s group leaves the stage. To be fair, Harry has never been to a dance night before so he doesn’t really know what he’s in for. 

A slower, calmer version of _Happier_ starts to play and the girls on stage start moving. They’re all wearing red-ish shirts and black sports pants and it doesn’t match as well as some of the older dancers’ outfits, but it doesn’t matter. 

Harry wishes James and Cassie were next to him and they could all be watching Lilly on stage. She’s so proud of the dance moves she’s learned in the past couple months and Harry has grown quite fond of the little girl. 

When the dance ends, thunderous applause even louder than before is praising the girls. Liam highfives each one on the way off stage with a proud grin after they bow for the audience. 

Harry doesn’t know anyone in the next group, but the choreographer and coach is introduced shortly and it’s the objectively pretty blonde that’s in Louis formation. The dance is more demanding and the movements cleaner and Harry even notices two boys in the formation.

“The next group we have are our teens, as I call them lovingly, which I also know they hate.” Liam laughs when someone backstage, probably a girl from that group, boos loudly at him. 

“The choreographer is my dear friend Louis Tomlinson”, Liam carries on and Louis appears on stage and waves. He’s dressed in the same skin-tight black leggings and beige shirt as Liam and it looks _so_ good on him. Harry doesn’t even try to hold back that particular thought. 

Next to Harry, Katy nudges his arm. “My niece is in that group.”

Harry recognises the cover as the one song he couldn’t get out of his head after watching _The Greatest Showman._  
It’s not like Harry can give qualitative feedback, but even with the little knowledge he has, he feels like the choreo is so _Louis_. Very expressive, very rich in variety. There’s an awful lot of jumping and rolling on the floor happening but the girls in their matching sparkling dresses make it look extremely elegant.

Katy and her sister whistle and cheer loudly when the group finishes, but Harry’s eyes stay on Louis who comes up and fist bumps the dancers, ruffling some of them through their hair under great protest. It looks like he’s genuinely happy. 

Next up is a group of adults older than the average university age and Harry doesn’t know anyone. Still it’s interesting to watch.

When the next dance is announced, Harry is actually thrilled. It’s Louis’ and Liam’s group. The girls in their group are dressed the opposite as the boys, with beige leggings and black shirts. It compliments each other well, Harry must admit. He wasn’t aware dancing was not only moving to music, but a whole act, more like. He wonders if professional dancers wear heavy make-up on stage too, like the drama people did in their annual school musicals. 

“Now I’m actually announcing my own group. We practice on Thursdays and a certain friend of mine has managed to be late to about every single practice of ours. Louis, I’m looking at you”, Liam fakes an annoyed glance but breaks out in a laugh when Louis sticks out his tongue. 

“I’ve known most of these wonderful people for a few years now, but I’m also happy we have a few newbies this year. Aiden, Barbara, I hope it’s a good first _Dance Into Christmas_ for you! Enjoy everyone!”

The song choice surprises Harry, way more upbeat than the ones he’s heard before. And while the other performances were very pleasing to watch, calming, this is enticing.

_How do you fall in love?_  
_Harder than a bullet could hit you_

Maybe Harry is slightly biased in his judgement, but this is the best performance he’s seen so far. It’s perfectly synchronised except for some minor slips and it varies between slow, sensual movements and strong, enthusiastic kicks when the singer gets louder, shriller. 

He tries to take in the whole picture as much as possible but in the end he’s not even ashamed that his eyes are following Louis. Louis who jumps high with perfectly straight legs like he’s doing a split in the air and rolls around on the floor just the next second without even coming to a stand. Louis who does more pirouettes with his legs and arms bend at different angles than Harry has brain cells. Louis who rolls backwards over his shoulder and actually ends up doing a split - _holy shit how flexible is he even_. 

When the chorus hits, the choreography gets more frantic and Harry likes that even more. Good thing he decided to come tonight. 

_Cursed is the fool who's willing_  
_Can't change the way we are_

Aware that this isn’t a concert you clap along to, Harry has to restrain himself. His body can’t decide whether it wants to sit completely still and just keep watching or get up and _do something_. Needless to say, he applaudes loudly because that’s what the dancers deserve. What Louis deserves. 

The dancers on stage are revelling in the audience’s feedback, bodies heaving, trying to catch a breath, before coming together to bow. 

Harry needs to see Louis after this. And he won’t take a no for an answer. 

The next act is a duo and Harry honestly focuses more on the song than on the actual dance. _Almost lover_ , thank you for the reminder. Which - he’s probably exaggerating a bit but who cares. 

When Louis enters the stage again for his duo with bowling alley Eleanor, he’s still wearing the leggings but a black long sleeved shirt now, matching his partner’s outfit. It’s even easier to get distracted and lost in their movements. 

They’re using a lot of space of the stage despite only being two people, running from and to each other like they’re telling a story. Maybe they are, Harry hasn’t got a clue how choreographing works. He should ask Louis about it. 

Harry would be lying if he’d claim there was no jealousy at all bubbling up in him, but it’s his fault he’s in the position he’s currently in. So many emotions are washing over him when Louis lifts Eleanor up in the air, smiling widely at her when their faces come close on her way down. Jealousy, obviously. But also because Louis has found something he’s good at, dedicated to and happy with. Pride, a lot of pride too. Louis is amazing and he worked hard and it’s paying off. 

He doesn’t really focus on the the last act, a trio of girls who are part of Louis’ Thursday formation. He’s shifting restlessly in his seat by the time all the dancers enter the stage together, to applaud and bow and wave some more. Liam sends everyone off to have a good night and a blessed christmas time and Harry is strongly considering just running off and chasing after Louis when Katy starts talking next to him. 

“It was good to see you, Harry. We’ll be off to pick up my niece. See you around in uni?”

“Uh, sure… Actually, no, I’ll come with you. Im, uh, friends with their, uh, coach?”

“Oh. Cool!”, Katy says and then they’re off. 

Apparently the changing rooms are behind and beneath the stage and they can’t just walk right in so they stick to waiting in a hallway. Katy and her sister keep chatting quietly after Harry and her ran out of small talk topics. 

With every passing minute, more dancers walk past them, Katy’s niece being one of them. Unfortunately, Harry doesn’t see anyone he’s actually talked to before, neither Liam, nor Eleanor nor Louis. 

“We’re going to head off, okay?”, Katy checks in on him. 

“Sure”, Harry assures. On a second thought, he turns to Katy’s niece who’s currently checking her phone. “Hey, sorry, do you happen to know where Louis is?”

She looks up and musters him. “No, sorry. Maybe he’s already gone? Or maybe he needs to stay and tidy up, I don’t know.”

Sighing, Harry runs a hand through his hair. Great. Either he missed Louis or he’s got to stay here like a stalker for what could be hours to talk to Louis. In the end, it’s the best decision to just go home and start another attempt of getting Louis to answer his texts. 

And he does. Late at night when Harry is already asleep, so when he sees the message the next morning, he’s positively surprised. 

**Harry: Hey Louis. You were amazing today, just wanted to let you know.**

**Louis: Thanks. Didnt think youd come**

**Harry: I’m glad i didnt miss it. Can we maybe meet up before we’re leaving for xmas?**

It takes a bit longer for Louis to answer this time, but Harry doesn’t know if Louis has a morning class or something, so he tries to not break his head worrying. 

**Louis: Okay. Thursday after my practice**

  
It doesn’t sound like a question and even if Harry had something else planned at that time, he’d most likely cancel it. So of course he agrees. 

-

James asks him if he’d like to come over after Lilly’s practice a last time before christmas break to have dinner with the family and Harry has to explain that yes, he’ll be accompanying him to the studio but no, he won’t be going home with them because he’s meeting up with Louis. James’ answer is just a smirk and Harry hits him lightly. 

Greeting Louis is unspectacular and Harry waves Lilly and James goodbye, wishing Lilly a nice christmas break as he probably won’t see the little girl anymore. When he turns to Louis then, Louis’ jacket is zipped up high and his sports bag is shouldered. 

“We can go to my place. Zayn is at his girlfriend’s all night.“

Harry hadn’t expected that, but he isn’t about to complain. “Sure.”

They walk to Louis’ car quietly and Louis moves a few things from his passenger seat before Harry sits down. The radio is playing quietly in the background and Harry doesn’t know whether to start a conversation, so he leaves that to Louis who decidedly stays silent until they arrive near his flat and he parallel parks skilfully. 

“I’m impressed”, Harry admits when he shuts the passenger door. 

Louis shrugs and shuffles through his keys. “I’d like to say I’m a natural but if we’re being honest here, it took a lot of practice. And Zayn is as helpful as a toast when it comes to directions.”

Louis’ and Zayn’s flat is on the third floor, which is even worse than Harry and Josh living on the second floor. 

“Good for your glutes though”, Louis argues despite looking just as annoyed as Harry feels whenever he needs to carry up groceries. He drops the keys on the kitchen counter and unzips his jacket to reveal the slightly sweaty shirt he’s worn to practice. 

“I’m going to take a shower so you can just go watch some Netflix in my room or something. Go grab whatever you want from the fridge except the curry. That’s Zayn’s and he’s going to kill me if you as much as move the Tupperware container.”

“Understood”, Harry nods. “Where’s your room?”

Louis gestures down the hallway. “Left door.”

Not wanting to be rude, Harry just grabs two glasses and fills them with water before he makes his way to take a look into Louis’ room. He can hear the shower running as he opens the door and stands for a second. Louis doesn’t have a sofa, so it’s either the bed or the desk chair and he settles on the latter, not wanting to intrude. 

He spots the remote next to the TV opposite of Louis’ bed but he doesn’t go for it. Instead, he just scrolls through Instagram once again, looking at stories of christmas market visits and mulled wine. 

When Louis enters the room, he looks incredibly soft. He’s dressed in trackies and a white shirt that’s a bit too big for him, but he heads straight to his closet and pulls out a grey hoodie to pull over his head. 

“You could’ve watched some Netflix.”

“I’m good. Didn’t want to, uh go through your stuff.” He fumbles with his hands where he keeps them in his lap. Louis looks at him funnily, grabs the remote and turns on the TV. 

“Are you hungry?”

“I could eat.”

“I’ll warm up some leftovers then, if you’re okay with that. Zayn’s girlfriend made something yesterday and it’s enough for two.” Harry simply nods and waits until Louis returns with two plates full of lasagna a few minutes later. 

They still haven’t talked. Sure, they did some superficial conversation about food and the flat, but the elephant is still in the room. When Louis is half way through his lasagna portion, he starts talking. 

“This feels like a déjà-vu”, he states simply. 

“I’m sorry.”

“Once again, feels like a déjà-vu.”

Harry shifts on the chair. Louis is sitting on his bed with crossed legs, balancing his plate on one knee. It looks so … domestic. 

“That’s because I repeatedly behave like an idiot.”

Louis keeps chewing before he gestures for Harry over to hand over one of the glasses.

“Go on”, he mumbles with food still in his mouth. 

“I don’t know why I keep fucking up. And I won’t repeat that I’m sorry because it gets annoying and I think you got the message. But I don’t want to just let this go.”

Not answering, Louis keeps looking at him, face twisted as if he’s thinking. What is he expecting Harry to say? Dropping the topic, Harry decides to talk about the christmas dance. 

“I was there. At the _Dance Into Christmas_ , I mean. I was pleasently surprised.”

 _Pleasently surprised._ Harry wants to hit himself in the face. 

“Yeah, I figured after your text.“

“You were really good.”

“Thanks.”

After that, silence fills the room. Harry doesn’t like it at all. He doesn’t want to give Louis the impression that being with him is awkward. 

“Uh”, he starts, frantically trying to think of something productive to say. 

“Listen, Harry. What do you want?”

It’s straight forward and Louis looks at him expectantly as he scoops up the last bit of cheese on his plate. The rest of Harry’s lasagna is long forgotten and has probably gone cold by now but he won’t be able to continue eating until this … issue has been cleared. 

“I think I’d… I think I’d like to try it. Us.”

Louis tilts his head to the left, his face unreadable. Maybe praying to all the divine creatures out there will keep him from kicking him out of the flat?

“Why?”

Harry goes with honest and straight forward, as well. 

“Because I have a crush on you.” He’s blushing furiously. And it sounds weird, saying it out loud, but also good. Like he’s finally confirming what his mind has been whispering all this time. 

“I’m a man”, Louis says, as if that’s an objection. 

“I’m aware”, Harry replies calmly.

“I’m a dancer.”

“Yeah, a good one”, Harry continues. 

“I’m a gay man who does gay dancing”, Louis summarises once again. 

The chair is getting uncomfortable, or maybe it’s just the talking, Harry doesn’t know. He rolls his shoulders back in the attempt of relieving some of the pressure. 

“Are you trying to talk me out of it?”, he inquires. “And don’t call it gay dancing. It’s not like you’re stripping in a gay club.”

“I might as well be. Dancing is gay, isn’t it?” It’s obvious he’s provoking. Harry is relatively sure what kind of reaction Louis is trying to get out of him, but he’s more than determined to not give him that. 

“Dancing isn’t rugby, yeah. But being able to do the splits is just as impressive as being a decent rugby player.” 

That’s a reasonable answer, Harry figures. Louis seems to think the same. 

“Are you serious about this?”

Nodding eagerly, Harry affirms. 

“Okay. This might be a really stupid decision, we’ll see, but okay. But don’t fuck this up again. I won’t be giving you any more chances. I’m fed up with you running after me apologising.”

Harry can’t help the way he cracks a smile. “Yes sir.”

Louis gets up to put his empty plate on the desk behind Harry, who’s very much unsure of what to do now. 

“So, uh…”, he starts but is interrupted by Louis before he can even form a question. 

“I have to pack now, I’m heading home tomorrow after uni already. But we can watch Netflix.” He nods over to the bed where he just sat and adds, “way more comfortable.”

Putting down his plate next to Louis’, Harry scrambles to get up and over to Louis’ bed without stumbling and falling. He’s settling against the headboard and reaches for the remote, peripherally watching Louis pack his suit case. When Louis doesn’t have any film requests, he just clicks on the first christmas movie recommendation, a Netflix original production he’s never heard of before. 

Turns out, the plot is not original at all but at least Harry can endure watching it without cringing every few minutes, so it’ll do. It only takes a few minutes until Louis joins him in bed and he’s not sure if that’s because Louis has actually finished packing or because Louis wants to cuddle. 

At first, Harry and Louis are sitting next to each other, their shoulders barely even touching. Apparently that’s not enough for Louis though, because he rests his head against Harry’s shoulder lightly, hesitantly, as if he’s asking if Harry is okay with it. He sure is. When his pulse has calmed a bit and Louis seems enough into the movie to not watch his every move, he extends his left arm over the headboard and settles it around Louis. In response, Louis shuffles down the bed and nuzzles further into Harry’s chest. 

And this way it continues. Every few minutes, one of them will shuffle closer, like they can’t help gravitating towards each other. Harry hooks his arm tighter around Louis, Louis twists his upper body to settle his arm over Harry’s waist as if he’s hugging him, Harry leans down to smell Louis’ freshly washed hair, Louis bends his leg to put it on top of Harry’s, effectively laying half on him now. 

“Is this going too fast?”, Louis asks when he looks up to Harry. A fair question, two hours ago they weren’t even really talking.

He looks even more comfy this way, his eyes flashing in the dim light, his skin glowing with the red-ish light from the telly. 

“No”, Harry replies and leans down even further, not breaking eye contact. When Louis doesn’t pull back, he closes the distance between their lips. 

It’s as soft as Harry expected. This is nothing like the chaste goodbye kiss in front of his building a few weeks back. This is way more sensual, even slower, just testing the waters but in a confident way. It feels like finally laying down in your cosy, warm bed after a horribly long and exhausting day. 

Louis sits up a bit, pressed against Harry’s side, to make the angle easier on both of their necks. They’re only half way through the movie but they really can’t be bothered to follow the plot anymore. Kissing is definitely more exciting. 

Harry puts his hand on Louis’ cheek and Louis looks like he considers mirroring the action before he settles on placing hand on Harry’s chest, a few inches from Harry’s heart. 

Kissing Louis is even more amazing this time around. He’s got a bit of a stubble, but Harry finds he honestly doesn’t mind. The first kiss didn’t do justice to Louis’ kissing skills, because he is very, very talented. Harry sighs into the kiss, content with how the evening has turned out. 

He has to be careful though, because inbetween the little pecks and Louis cranking up the speed of the kiss by licking into his mouth, it’s easy to lose control. Especially since Louis’ hand has started wandering down his chest, past his waist and is now slowly stroking back and forth on his right upper thigh. He wonders if Louis is doing it on purpose or if he’s maybe so lost in the kissing he’s not quite aware of his actions. 

Letting out a shivery breath and breaking the kiss shortly, he realises that Louis is aware. But he’s not going to go any further himself, waiting on Harry to make the next move, to follow his pace.

“Mhh.” The soft noise escapes him when he once again breaks the kiss to catch a breath and Louis decides his mouth can’t be left unoccupied and he starts kissing down his jaw, towards his neck. At this point, Harry has to actually suppress a moan, the situation in his pants only getting worse by the second. 

Louis notices and looks up to him, his eyes asking _Okay?_. Harry nods slightly and dips his head down to engage Louis in a kiss again, shifting slightly. 

Harry’s willpower lasts a whole two more minutes before he can’t take it anymore. The hand on his thigh has continued stroking adamantly and it’s so close to where Harry wants it, but not close enough. 

As if Louis senses what’s going to happen, he slows down, un-deepening the kiss as Harry sneaks his own hand down to Louis’ hand on his thigh, stroking over it lovingly before lifting his and placing it a few inches to the right, on the bulge at the front of his trousers. 

“Ngh.” Louis doesn’t even apply any pressure and Harry doesn’t press his hand down either, but it still feels so good. 

“Is this going too fast?” It’s Harry’s turn to repeat the question from earlier, sounding breathless. He feels his cheeks burning and it’s not only because Louis’ blanket is keeping them warm. 

Louis looks Harry straight in the eyes, checking if Harry genuinely wants this or if it’s just in the spur of the moment. When he can’t find any doubt, Louis pushes his hand down lightly. 

“No.”

Harry makes a choked sound, pleasure rocking through him, causing him to kick out his legs. Kissing isn’t the only thing Louis seems intuitively good at. 

It’s a matter of another minute before Louis finally tugs at Harry’s belt. 

“Can I?”, he asks and honestly, how can Harry deny him, looking like that? His cheeks are tinted an adorable shade of pink, his mostly dried hair sticking up wildly, drowning in his hoodie. Harry nods impatiently and hums, unbelieving that this is really happening. Louis, opening his trousers and pushing them down enough to sneak his hand in. Now with only one terribly thin layer of fabric between Louis’ hand and his dick, he can’t stop his head from lolling back against the headboard. 

“Okay?”, Louis whispers, letting the waistband of Harry’s briefs snap against his skin. “Yeah, please”, Harry sighs with his eyes closed. Well, it didn’t take long for him to start begging. 

And lord, does Louis comply. The stimulation of his soft fingers on Harry’s painfully hard cock is more than overhwelming and it only gets better with every twist of Louis’ wrist, alternating between quick and teasingly slow, between closing his fingers around the base and thumbing over Harry’s head. 

Due to the position of Louis half-hovering over him and half-leaning against him, it’d be very uncomfortable for Harry to try and return the favour at the same time (also because he isn’t sure if he could concentrate on anything but Louis’ fingers right now), but judging from the movement of Louis’ arm he’s taking care of that himself. 

The kiss has turned sloppy, unfocused, and both of them are panting loudly, restraining from making embarrassing sounds. 

“Kiss me”, Harry whimpers when Louis pulls back, not caring how needy he sounds. Louis’ lips are back on him in a matter of split seconds, contributing to the evergrowing pleasure both of them are experiencing. 

When it all becomes too much and he finally comes with a low groan, it’s spectucular, the best orgasm he’s had in months, maybe years. He needs a breather before being able to think about helping Louis out, but Louis’ hand is already moving more rapidly and he follows not long after. 

Harry doesn’t regret it. Not when Louis pulls his hands out of both their pants and asks Harry to pass him a tissue or two from the nightstand. Not when Louis returns from washing his hands and changing his briefs, not when they cuddle up on the bed before Harry has to inevitably leave. Not when he kisses Louis goodbye and wishes him a good time at home, celebrating christmas. 

-

  
Harry takes the train home on Saturday, a day later than Louis, but still a few days prior to Christmas. He’s fully aware he should be revising as exams are nearing in January, but it’s not next year yet. December has always been an excuse for Harry to keep pushing his duties to the very edge of what’s justifiable. 

His sister picks him up from the train station and they chat easily about how life’s been treating them. She’s doing well, new job and flat in Manchester and Harry’s truly happy for her. 

Over the next few days, Louis and Harry keep texting a solid amount. Apparently Louis has lots of siblings to entertain and Harry’s family isn’t too on board with him barricading himself in his room with Louis on the line. In the end he puts his phone notifications on silent for his grandma’s sake - because she deserves his attention and also because she’d be scolding him if he didn’t. 

On christmas eve, Harry ponders intensely about what to text Louis for his birthday. At first he considers calling him but to be honest, he hates calling and he doesn’t know how preoccupied Louis is at any moment so texting it is. 

**Harry: Happy birthday Lou!! Hope you have a good day however you’re spending it :) xx**

It takes Louis a while to respond and in the meantime Harry tries distracting himself in the kitchen, going through tomorrow’s dinner menu with his mum. 

**Louis: Thanks love xx**

Harry knows that Louis has texted him as he’s been obsessively checking his screen every few minutes, but doesn’t click on it yet. Louis doesn’t need to get the impression that he’s practically waiting for his answer. 

So when he checks his phone again a few minutes later to finally open Whatsapp, Louis’ has sent a picture as well. Someone else has to have taken it because both of his hands are occupied, one supporting his weight on the kitchen table, the other pointing to the birthday cake on said table. Little atoms and physical formulas are drawn on it in icing and it’s adorably personal. Louis is smiling so widely his eyes are squinting and he looks exceptionally fit in the jumper he’s wearing.

**Harry: Aww that’s sweet. I wouldn’t say no to some cake now either :(**

**Louis: Come over. Tho i cant promise therell be any left by the time ud arrive :D**

**Harry: Id come anyway if I could**

**Louis: Im sure you would ;)**

Harry is extremely thankful he’s alone in the living room when he reads Louis’ newest reply which is causing him to blush traiterously. His family has already picked up on and questioned his obvious smile in relation to him opening a text and he can’t let the interrogations go any deeper. 

“Is there a special someone causing you to stick to your phone like it’s glued to your fingers?”, his mum had asked. 

“Just a friend sending a silly picture”, Harry had replied in order to not be suspicious but drop the topic as quickly as possible. Gemma had approached him in the hallway, reassuring him that he could always trust him with anything he wanted to talk about. He’d simply shot her a smile and told her he’d come back to it before going upstairs to his old room. 

Christmas is uneventful but just as exhausting as every year. He unwraps presents and eats his bodyweight in extravagant food he and his mum had prepared and goes to a crowded church service with his grandma and sister. 

It barely leaves time to text Louis without being rude to his family, so he cuts down on it, postponing it to bed time when no one can see the screen light through the door slot. 

Three days later, he actually starts revising - and is so proud of himself, he makes sure to let everyone doubting the student life know. Including Louis, who has begun revising as well inbetween trying to catch up with his school friends, judging from his Instagram stories and whatever he tells Harry about his day. 

So a few days later, Harry decides to get his old squad back together as well. It’s been too long since he’s last seen the boys. 

They meet up in a pub because that’s what grown-ups do when they reunite. They don’t get mindleslly pissed in someone’s garden shed or play spin the bottle. No, grown-ups talk about their sex life just like that without inhibitions. At least Harry’s friends do so. 

Brad, for example, is just going on how great his very active sex life with his long term girlfriend of two years is. Alec is throwing in how he simply cannot decide between the two chicks he’s currently … involved with. 

Harry’s not sure if he should question his own standards or his friends’. 

He’s questioning all things Louis and Leeds though. Not in a “I’m going to back out” way, but just. Just thinking about it. How his life feels just as flipped-turned upside down as Will’s in Fresh Prince of Bel Air. One day he’s just living life trying to graduate and not disappoint his family, the next he’s head over heels for a contemporary dancer who does crazy shit like splits, of all people. How his life before studying in Leeds feels so different somehow.

New year’s eve comes and goes, Harry opting to stay inside as much as justifiable in front of his family who aw and oh at all the right moments when the fireworks explode in the sky. 

Louis sends him a selfie of himself holding a sparkler, grinning and wishing Harry a very happy new year. ( **Louis: or shall I say, Harry new year? ;)** ) ( **Harry: you shall not, its my job to make horrendous jokes** )

Before he knows it, he’s back in his little room in Leeds. Louis’ asked him if he wants to come around his flat for a little get together with his friends. Is this an inoffical getting to know the friends? 

However, he agrees, not only because it’d be rude to decline, but also because he is eager to see Louis again. 

He asks Louis to send his address; it’s not like he actively tried to memorise it the last time he was there and he doesn’t want to ghost around the streets aimlessly for hours. Louis says he doesn’t need to bring anything but his lovely self, but Harry feels naked and impolite so he grabs a pack of crisps that could very well be Josh’s. 

And Harry doesn’t know Niall at all, but crisps seem to work amazingly as an ice breaker with him so what’s more to want. 

“Guys, this is Harry”, Louis introduces him when they enter Zayn’s room as he has the bigger and tidier one. He waves awkwardly into the round and holds up the bag. “Hi. Brought some crisps.”

“Ace. I’m Niall”, a brunette boy says and shamelessly makes grabby hands for the crisps. Handing them over, Harry averts his eyes to Louis, silently asking where he could sit as the bed is already taken by four men. It only takes Louis a second to roll his own desk chair into the room and place it next to Zayn’s where Harry plops down. 

“And what’s your names?”, he tries to make conversation, choosing to ignore how silent the room has fallen except for Niall munching loudly. 

“I’m Aiden”, a dark haired boy offers and Harry thinks he’s seen him before. In Louis’ dance group probably. Only then he notices Liam sitting on the bed as well, smiling kindly at him. 

“I’m Liam but you already know that.”

“’m Zayn”, the last man chimes in quietly. He’s leaning against the bed’s headboard as if nothing in the world could stress him. 

“Your flatmate?”, Harry checks in with Louis and gets a nod in response. “Yeah, the slave holder himself.” It takes a while before Harry’s able to connect the dots. 

“Oh yeah, you were in that bus accident too, Louis said? How’s the shoulder, it was?”

“I’m good. And also not half as bad as Louis paints the picture right now. How’s your friend?”

“She’s better, I think. Her ribs took a bit of time to heal, but she’s mainly back to normal. Started working again and all that.”

Zayn nods and Harry isn’t sad about the conversation turning towards christmas break and how the boys spent it. 

Louis tells about all the shenanigans his siblings were up to, Liam how he drove down to Wolverhampton with to spend his first christmas with his family _and_ his girlfriend, Niall about how outrageously stale the air plane food was on his flight to Ireland. Without noticing it, Harry slips right in, throwing in cheeky comments here and there, making even Louis cackle occasionally. 

About half an hour into their lads evening, the door bell rings and Louis gets up, only to come back with a heavily breathing man. 

“Mate, I hate these stairs, why the fuck d’you have to live on third floor?” Louis just chuckles and offers him something to drink. 

“Hi lads“, he greets everyone with a nod and sits down on what used to be Louis’ seat. Harry’s not in the position to protest, not even knowing the stranger, but Louis just plops down on the floor anyways, leaning back to use Harry’s leg as a backrest. With a short look up to him he checks if it’s alright and in response, Harry puts down his second foot on the floor as well to give Louis a balanced support to settle against. 

After a long discussion about what food to order, with Niall agreeing to every single option and Liam handing out the first round of beer, everything is quite relaxed. 

The new man turns out to be Lewis. “Quite the accent”, Harry comments. “Scottish”, Lewis replies proudly. “The only country worth living in.”

“Says the guy who’s studying in England”, Niall fips and gets flipped the bird. 

“Shut up leprechaun, you’ve got no say in anything“, Lewis says before turning to Harry curiously. “So are you a new dancer too?”

“Uh, no, no. I don’t dance.” He feels Louis stiffen where’s he’s still resting against his shins. It reminds him of meeting Cher, and denying Louis as a boyfriend. They still hadn’t put a lable on it yet. And dancing remains a sore topic, no matter how peaceful their last time talking about it had turned out. 

Before Harry can make it any worse and awkward, Louis clears his throat and takes the lead.

“Nah, Aiden was the only one joining us this semester.” So it’s indeed the boy Harry’s seen in the studio before. “Harry’s in his first year of studying social work.”

It’d be blatantly obvious how Louis is trying to change topics if it weren’t for Liam to pipe up unexpectantly. 

“Oh really? I didn’t know that. Me too, I’m in my third year right now.”

They start talking about what they’re studying or more like, explaining it to Harry as the six of them seem to know each other quite well. 

Zayn does linguistics, which honestly suits him. Harry hasn’t known him for longer than a few hours, but it just fits to the way he carries himself and talks, hell, even the way his room is furnished. Aiden is a sports science undergrad, which also played a role in him starting to dance as he admits.

“Lewis and I are both in music and mangament, that’s actually how we met. He’s full time and I’m part time though. Really trying to get me an internship for the second semester”, Niall explains. 

“Actually doing it is always different than only studying the theory”, Harry agrees, thinking of his own placement, hopefully in assessment and child protection, looming in the near future. 

Niall goes on about how he’s been playing the guitar for ages and sometimes messes around with a mate of his who also plays the guitar. 

“If it wasn’t so unrealistic to make it big? I’d be trying that instead of studying management.”

“Well, you’ve always got a Plan B at least, in case your dissertation flops”, Louis teases with a smile playing around his lips. 

“Excuse you! I’m a perfect straight A student.”

“Mhh.”

“Harry, I’d seriously reconsider your life choices. Lou isn’t as much fun around when you get to know him better”, Niall warns him, reaching for a new bottle of beer and putting down the empty one on the floor next to the bed. It’s quite impressive how incessantly he’s been drinking and not even showing the slightest signs of being tipsy. 

“Don’t listen to him babe”, Louis says directed to Harry. While he wants to focus on being called babe, he can’t help but notice how Louis winces when he leans back, obviously no longer comfortable on the floor. Harry taps him on the shoulder lightly. 

“We can switch if you wanna?“

Choosing to ignore him, Louis doesn’t answer until Harry pats him again. “C’mon, get up old man.”

“Oi, I’m not old!”, he defends himself but can’t help moving when Harry stands up and effectively removes Louis’ backrest. Holding out both hands, he pulls Louis to a stand too before softly pushing him towards the now empty chair. “Sit down.”

Without further protest, Louis settles on the pre-warmed seat, rolling his shoulders to release the built-up tension. Harry is just about to plop down on the floor when Louis surprisingly pulls him straight into his lap. Involuntarily, Harry tenses, not wanting to catch attention. 

“Relax”, Louis whispers into his ear. “They don’t mind.”

Even after Louis tries to calm him down, it takes a few minutes until he’s comfortable enough to not support his own weight anymore and just let himself settle against Louis’ front. To be honest, his thighs would’ve given in one way or another in the next sixty seconds anyway. 

The conversation carries on like before. Both Liam and Lewis eye them curiously but not in a rude way, so Harry can handle that. It seems that indeed they do not care. 

Further into the evening, they start watching some crappy matchmaker series, an even cheaper version of Temptation Island, where people walk around half naked and hook up with random strangers. Everyone is focused on roasting the participants so when Louis’ arms tighten around Harry’s tummy, he doesn’t mind but actually covers Louis’ hand with his own. Behind himself, he feels Louis smile into his shoulder, nuzzling into the hoodie. 

All in all, their little get together turns out way better than Harry had expected. They don’t bring up the issue of Harry fiercely denying even the idea of being connected to contemporary dance or the like.

  
Aside from that, Harry actively tries to better himself, to be the best boyfriend (boyfriend?) he can possibly be. 

They hang out more often, whenever their uni and work timetables let them and neither of them is busy with sports or excessive study sessions. 

It’s yet again another Friday afternoon and instead of going out for food, Louis and Harry decide on cooking lunch themselves to save some money. While Harry’s trying to fish all ingredients they need from the fridge, Louis pours them a drink. When he’s finished he settles his foot on the counter and leans forward, humming some random tune Harry can’t decipher. Not wanting to interrupt him, Harry watches him carefully. 

“You’re freakingly flexible aren’t you?”

“Hm?”, Louis makes, obviously stretching unconsciously. When he realises what Harry means, he quickly puts his foot back on the ground. “Oh sorry. Bad habit.“

In what world can stretching be a habit you don’t even notice? Not Harry’s at least.

“No, no, I don’t mind.”

An awkward silence fills the room, neither of them knowing what to say while they just stare at each other. To overcome that, Louis grabs his glass and takes a sip of the juice. 

“Can you just do the splits whenever? Like, could you do them right now?”, Harry asks curiously. 

Swallowing, Louis sets the glass aside. “I mean, technically I could but I’d have to warm up a bit.”

“Does it make a difference if your right or left leg’s in front?”

“Mh, my right leg is easier. I think it’s that way with most dancers.”

“And middle splits?”

Louis grimaces and Harry finds it endlessly endearing. “Not really my favourite, to be honest. For me, stretching for the middle splits has always been harder than normal ones.”

“But can you do them?“

“Not by definition”, Louis chuckles. “But we can make a deal. I’ll show you and you cook lunch?“ His smile is wide and it doesn’t take much convincing. 

“Deal.“

So for the next fifteen minutes, Harry prepares spaghetti carbonara and a salad while peripherally gaping at Louis doing the best to stretch and warm up in the kitchen. When he sets the small table pushed to the wall and announces that he’s almost done, Louis pulls him into the hallway. 

“Not enough space in there”, he explains and casually slides down into middle splits like it’s the way he usually sits down on the floor. 

“What the - ”

Looking down, Louis shrugs. There are one and a half, two inches at most missing and his arse would be touching the wooden floor. “See, not fully middle splits.”

Not even trying to conceal how impressed he is, Harry swallows. “Just say it’s the trousers.“

Louis’ laugh is interrupted by Josh stepping out of his room, surprising Harry who didn’t even know he was home the whole time. Caught off guard, Josh’s eyes sway from Louis to Harry and back to Louis. 

“Uh.”

“You must be Harry’s flatmate? Hi, I’m Louis”, he introduces himself when he pulls himself back up. 

“Hi, I’m Josh”, he replies and catches himself quickly. “While I’d love to see some more of whatever magic the both of you are working here, I’m off to work. See you.” He waves at them shortly and makes a beeline for the door, pulling it shut forcefully. 

Harry breaks out in a laugh as soon as he’s sure Josh is out of hearing range, Louis joining in. 

“Well, you surely made a lasting impression on him.”

“Definitely. If he ever wants to learn it himself and needs help, I’m a good teacher.”

Chuckling, Harry ushers him back into the kitchen so the meal he’s put a lot of effort into won’t go cold. “I’ll let him know.”

Louis shoots him a careful glance when he sits down and picks up the cutlery. “I thought you’d freak out more.” 

“Because of Josh?“ Louis nods. 

Harry simply shrugs. ”He’s a chill guy.”

That seems to satisfy Louis and he digs in, complimenting Harry more than necessary, resulting in both of them finishing their food with a big smile plastered on their faces. 

-

Things go downhill mid January, a week before exam season starts and shortly before every student’s existential anxiety hits. Harry isn’t surprised at all that he falls under that category as well, always has no matter how hard he studies. What surprises him though is how needy he gets for Louis’ mental support while before it’s always been the other way round, with Louis initiating most of their time together. 

“What are you doing Wednesday evening?”, Harry asks without looking up from the book in front of him. He’s comfortably settled between the blanket and pillows on Louis’ bed but despite all the things he’d rather be doing right now, his social work law exam is nearing. 

Louis swings around, left leg pulled up on the desk chair and reading glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. 

“Wednesday? Uh”, he ponders. “I’m taking over Perrie’s class and after that El asked if we could slide in an extra practice.”

That’s not exactly what Harry has hoped the answer would be. 

“An extra practice? Why? And why are you taking over Perrie’s class again, didn’t you already last week?“

It’s not Harry’s intention to sound accusing, but it still comes out that way. 

“To get our mind off exam season for a bit. El’s been super stressed and it’s always helped her, and me too, to escape that for a few hours.” He takes off his glasses and clicks the pen he’s holding repeatedly. “And I’m taking over Perrie’s kids because she needs to hand in an essay on Friday and she asked me to.“

“So bascially, you’re the handyman?“ Harry rearranges the pillows in his back and pushes the book he desperately needs to read aside. “Perrie can’t make it? You do it. Eleanor’s stressed? You come over. What else? We need a new prime minister. But oh, no worries, you’ll do it?”

“Whoa, where’s all this coming from?” Louis’ focused face twists into a confused and slightly offended frown. Licking his lips, he puts down his arm on his pulled up leg. “What exactly is your problem?”

“You barely have time for yourself. You’re giving up your free time so everyone else can focus on the things the need to do and the exams they need to study for…”

“Don’t worry about my exams. I feel quite confident with most of it, except for maybe Superconductivity but I’ve still got a week and a half left until that.”

Maybe Harry’s been overreating a bit. Louis’ an adult and it’s up to him how he wants to organise his time. He avoids looking at Louis, opts to stare out of the window instead and lets his hand wander over the soft fabric of Louis’ blanket absentmindedly. He hears Louis take a deep breath but there’s nothing else coming from him. Harry doesn’t want to be ridiculous, he decides, so he’ll just be a grown up and look past it. 

“What about Thursday then? I don’t have research methods anymore so we could grab something to eat that afternoon and I can come along to practice to pick up Lilly. Haven’t done that in a while.”

Once again Louis grimaces like he doesn’t want to say what he’s about to say. “Eh… I’m taking over Liam’s class on Thursday.”

Harry’s eyebrows shoot up and it’s hard not to show all the things he feels and wants to say right now. “Oh?“

“It’s Liam’s and Sophia’s one month anniversary and he asked me if I could take over.”

“Mhm”, is all Harry has to say to that. It’s obvious Louis is trying to navigate himself and them out of the tense situation they’re currently stuck in, his mind goings five miles a minute in search for a peace making offer. 

“But we can meet on Friday, if you’re free? Grab some lunch?“

Harry lets out an annoyed huff. “No, Louis, we can’t. Because, as I’ve already told you twice, I’m meeting James to go over law. And don’t you need to work that afternoon?“

“Shit, I completely forgot.” The reminder of his shift at the café hits Louis and he immediately reaches for his phone, needing to make a note or he’ll probably forget. 

“Yeah, shit.”

Putting his phone aside, Louis refocuses his attention on Harry. ”But we can still find another time to meet. Like, Saturday morning after I go grocery shopping. Or maybe…”

“No, it’s fine, I get it. You don’t have time for me.” He accentuates his pettiness with a fitting facial expression and raised eyebrows and is quite proud of himself. It sounds as needy and ridiculous as Harry thought it’d feel to say it out loud, but it also feels freeing. 

“That’s not true.”

“It is though. Dancing is more important than me. You’re in the studio more often than you see me.“ He doesn’t phrase it like a question, because it’s not meant to be a question but a provocation. 

“Dancing is a big thing in my life, yes”, Louis agrees, trying very hard to compose himself. “Actually the reason why I’ve been in the studio a lot lately is that we’ve been trying to organise a thing with other dance studios, kind of like a Christie Cup. But you’re so stuck up in your accusations right now that you won’t even listen to me, whatever I’m trying to say. Because I would make time for you, if you just knew how to properly communicate to me that that’s what you want from me!“

Harry’s hand come down on the bed and it makes a loud thud, like he’s purposely slapping it. 

“Well then! I want to you to make time for me and not only your studio. Eleanor’s been stressed, well duh, sorry to break it, I’ve been too, everyone’s been because it’s fucking exam season! Liam gets to see Sophia on their one month anniversary and I don’t get to see you the whole week, how’s that fair? Who even celebrates one month anniversaries?” 

He’s fully aware he’s just ranting senselessly at this point, but it feels so good to let off some steam. Except for James he doesn’t have anyone to complain to about exams as he doesn’t want to worry his family nor annoy his innocent flatmate. Not that Josh’s been home a lot lately. If he ends up not failing any of his exams with the life style he’s been leading lately, Harry will definitely need to go to him for some tips. 

“Well you know what! Maybe Liam gets to see his girlfriend not only because he asked nicely but also because Sophia isn’t a fucking coward who can’t pull her head out of her arse but actually stands by her boyfriend!“

Hearing Louis shouting this is the final straw and he forcefully closes his book, scrambling up to stuff it into his backpack. Louis doesn’t attempt to stop him or calm their argument. He can’t believe they just went from happiness and butterflies in paradise to a full blown argument with both of them venting whatever’s been stressing them. 

“Well, your big thing in life is dancing, mine is my exams right now. Maybe at home I’ll be able to study peacefully. We can talk after exams, if you’re not at practice then”, Harry says while shouldering his bag. 

“Grow up Harry”, Louis hisses. When Harry’s through the door, which he leaves open to piss Louis off so he’ll have to get up to close it himself, he adds “We can talk after exams if you’re not back to straight by then.“

He’s fully aware it’s not the most elegant way to end a fight with someone by throwing their insecurities into their face, but Louis can’t help it. Their whole argument has been a whole back and forth of who’s got the pettier comeback. In the end, the only answer he gets is Harry slamming the flat’s door so loudly that Zayn carefully peeks into Louis’ room to check on him. 

-

  
Taking an exam is just as nerve-wrecking as Harry remembered. The nights before he can’t fall asleep, when he eventually falls asleep his dreams are haunted by the fear of oversleeping and missing the exam and when he gets up he can’t stomach anything, causing his tummy to rumble loudly in the middle of the exam. 

Social work law almost kills him and it feels like he’s breathing for the first time in days when he steps out of the exam. Grabbing his phone from his backpack he sees James and Cher exiting the exam room, heading towards him. Unsurprisingly there’s no text from Louis. 

“Hey, how’d it go?”, Cher asks cheerfully, way too lively for someone who’s just finished an exam. 

Harry shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly, hating the “what’s your answer on question xy”-post-exam-talk. “Dunno, we’ll see.”

Next to him James rummages through his backpack, looking for something edible and finally taking a big bite of his sandwich. With his mouth full he joins the conversation. 

“Honestly? It was easier than I thought it’d be. I’ve got something for every question, probably not correct but I wrote something. But I’m also not aiming to be top of the class.”

That’s not really what Harry wants to hear when he already feels insecure about his performance on basically every exam he’s taken so far. Yes, he’s fully aware that James is indeed not aiming as high as he does himself, with having a family and everything. 

Who aims to be top of the class though, is Louis. They’ve never explicitly talked grades but it’s no secret Louis is pretty fucking smart and seemingly never despairs with any task or equation despite studying physics. Harry admires his intelligence and wishes him all the best for his own exams that he knows Louis will ace. At the same time he hates admitting to himself that Louis doesn’t even leave his head when he’s taking his own tests, how dare he? Louis’ fucking with his head while he desperately needs to focus and there’s nothing he can do about it. 

On his way home, Harry inevitably overthinks the answers he wrote down on the paper half an hour earlier, already thinking of multiple ways how he could’ve done better and he feels incredibly stupid, especially comparing himself to a certain other boy.

  
Their long awaited (or feared) post-exam talk falls on yet another Friday and coincidentally it’s also the day Harry’s last exam is scheduled for. Those cursed Fridays.   
When Louis had texted him, commanding to meet him downtown by a chinese take-away place rather than suggesting it, everything in Harry wanted to be petty and talk back. In the end he doesn’t, simply affirming that he’ll be there. There’s a few moments when he feels like chickening out and cancelling, using his exam that morning as an excuse. 

The exam on social work with adults is just as meh as the social work law and Harry’s glad he can flee the group discussion about it. James comes up to him, looking relieved to be done with exam season, and proposes they could go grab some take-away. 

“Sorry, I can’t today, I’m meeting up with Louis. Another day though, we have to celebrate surviving this shit.”

Probably figuring from Harry’s facial expression, James looks at him quizzically. 

“Everything okay with you and Louis?”

And what does Harry reply to that? He doesn’t know. Them meeting up today will probably end with Harry apologising once again because yes, he’s been kind of unreasonable and he’s not really good at this whole relationship thing. Hell, they still haven’t even called it that. 

“I don’t know”, he sighs. “We had a fight before exams, haven’t talked to him since.”

Suddenly he feels horrible for not even texting Louis a simple _good luck_ before his exams. On the other hand, Louis hadn’t either. But still.

James looks at him pityingly. “Well, I hope you figure it out then. I’ll see you soon, still owe you a few beers mate.”

They say their goodbyes and then Harry takes off, getting on a bus and stuffing headphones into his ears. The first song that comes on is _River_ , the song that Louis’ group had danced to at _Dance into Christmas_ and that had bugged Harry all night until he had googled and binge-listened to it for two days straight. 

  
Louis’ already there when Harry finally finds the Chinese fastfood restaurant. Despite not knowing where they stand with each other, Harry feels brave and goes to hug Louis. When he’s not stopped but Louis actually returns the hug, he breathes out in relief. 

“Hey.”

“Hi. C’mon let’s get something and go for a walk”, Louis suggests. On a second thought he adds “If you’re okay with that?”

“Sure.”

A few minutes later they both have a gigantic box of fried noodles in their hands, wandering around aimlessly in search of an unoccupied bench. It’s not the best place to talk, in public like that, but at least it’s neutral ground.

Harry digs in, having built up quite the appetite, and occasionally spares Louis a glance but leaves it to the other lad to start the conversation. 

“How was your exam this morning?”

Harry can’t help the puzzled look on his face, his eyes mustering Louis’ face carefully. 

“Uhm, okay I guess. I don’t know… hard to say. I’ll have to wait for the result.” He shrugs and faces his noodles again. “Didn’t think you’d remember.”

Louis mimics him, shrugging too. “Just did. The dates stuck.” He pokes around in his box, unsuccessfully attempting to get a big load from his fork in his mouth, resulting in most of it falling back down, some even past the box nearly hitting Louis’ vans. When he looks up there’s sweet and sour sauce on his chin and he’s trying not to drip everywhere. 

Chuckling loudly Harry hands him a tissue and earns a chuckle in return. “Thanks.”

It all feels so easy, so natural like it always feels when he’s having a good time with Louis. But he knows it’s not all solved with some fastfood and a bit of banter. There’s a few things they should definitely talk about it and pushing it off any further will make things unnecessarily awkward so Harry decides to just rip off the band-aid. 

“Where uh- … are we … okay?”

 _Good job Harry, really eloquent_. Louis sighs and puts his box on one knee, directing his attention to the man next to him rather than his food. 

“I don’t really know what to tell you, Harry. I want us to be okay, but like, are we just going to forget our fight? The issues are still there, you know.”

Agreeing, Harry nods. He doesn’t want to agree, but he knows rationally that Louis is right. 

“I feel like you’re going to rip my head off if I apologise now but I’m going to say it anyway: I’m sorry. It’s kind of ridiculous, I know, but it seems like I always find a new way to fuck it up.”

Louis doesn’t reply for a second, caught up in his thought and mindlessly staring at the H&M in front of them. People are walking past them, chattering about so many different topics, some of them carrying shopping bags, others McFlurries. Harry’s watching two teenage girls pointing at stuff in the display window when Louis speaks up again. 

“It’s not only your fault. I said some stuff I shouldn’t have too. I think we both needed to calm down a bit these past days and not get deeper into the fight right between exams.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

Louis angles himself so that his knees point towards Harry and shovels more food into his mouth. 

“I’m aware you’re still going through a lot”, he says and halts for a moment. “God, that sounds awfully much like a therapist. I’m not trying to be a therapist, I’m just saying I’d like to think that I understand what’s going on with you.”

Harry chuckles lightly, encouraging him to keep going. 

“It’s just - I hate fighting. I like spending time with you when we’re not fighting. But we’re fighting a lot and most of it is so, so unnecessary. You know?”

“I know.” Harry’s not really sure where Louis is going with this and a fear in the back of his mind keeps growing that maybe they’ll break up before they’ve even gotten together officially.

“Basically, our … we’re like a sinus curve. Positive and negative at regular intervals. Well, more or less regular. You know what I mean”, he says and scratches the back of his head, running his hand through his ruffled hair. It looks adorable. 

“Oh, talk physics to me”, Harry jokes with a smile playing around his lips, glad it’s breaking the tension a bit. “I do know what a sinus curve looks like though, don’t worry”, he reminds Louis, making him chuckle. 

“Good, good. I honestly don’t even know what I was going for with that metaphor, but lets stick to it. Quite frankly, I want our graph to be positive only. Or most of the time. Let’s keep it above the zero, yeah?”

“I’m in”, Harry replies energetically. “But”, he adds and looks Louis straight in the eyes. “If our graph were a person’s heartbeat, we’d kill him with that.”

It takes Louis a second to catch up and then he groans and slaps Harry’s arm without force.

“Okay, this has to stop right now. No more metaphor talking.”

“Alright. I mean it, though. I’m trying, I’ll be trying even more. I want this.”

He’s serious and Louis seems to sense that too. Louis slides even closer so that their knees are touching and it feels comforting, reassuring. 

“I know. I want this too. And I’m sure we can figure this out - we just need to talk if there’s something bugging us. Exams were stressful, I know, but that’s no excuse.  
Communication is key and all that.”

While Harry is tempted to make a stupid, inappropriate joke about locks and keys, he keeps quiet and savours the moment. This has already worked out so much better than he had anticipated. Maybe they are getting better at this. 

“I’ll try, I promise.”

Louis’ dopey smile as a reponse is enough of a reward and Harry feels his mood lifting by the second. Exams are over, the fight with Louis resolved, it’s the start of a free weekend. They finish their food chattering about their past days, skilfully avoiding the topic of exams. 

“You mentioned a thing you were trying to organise? Like a Christie cup?”, Harry suddenly remembers when he thinks back to the day of their fight. 

For a moment Louis looks unsure whether he wants to go down that road but nods eventually. 

“Yeah. It’s been an idea for a few years but I think this year we finally might go through with it.”

“So what exactly are we talking about here? Are you just going throw your own little party next to the cup?”

He puts his box down on the bench, full and satisfied. It’s impossible to finish it all but at least he’ll have something to finish for dinner then. 

Louis pulls a thinking face. “I mean, kinda? Not really. Dancing is not a discipline in the cup, as you know, and we’re not trying to go official or anything. But a friend of mine who used to be in our Thursday formation, he moved to Manchester and he has a new studio there now. We’ve been meaning to meet up for ages so we thought, why not connect it with a little dance show?”

Harry keeps his focus strictly on Louis, smiling endeared when he sees how involved Louis is in this whole thing. Of course Louis would be a moving spirit for something like this. 

“And then it was an obvious next thought to add Liverpool too. Like, Leeds, Liverpool and Manchester, that’d fit so well you know? The classic. But we wouldn’t want it to be a competition, more like an exchange. Dancing is a rather subjective sport compared to the other cup sports so we’d rather do it for fun.”

“Sounds pretty cool”, Harry comments. He doesn’t really know much about the cup nor dancing and most of the questions he could ask Louis had already answered. “The whole studio or just the students?”

“The adult groups probably. We won’t differentiate between students and not-students but I think it’d be a bit much with the kids too. We plan on doing it the same afternoon the first actual cup day will be held and it’s not like the _Dance into Christmas_ , we’d have to announce it before and check in with the parents, blabla. And we have a spring show anyway, so the kids won’t feel left out if we tell them it’s for adults only.”

“There’s a spring show too?”, Harry asks interested. “I didn’t know that. I never thought the studio would organise so many events. What else is there? Summer dance? Autumn dance?”

Louis laughs and rolls his shoulders. The bench doesn’t have a backrest and it’s getting uncomfortable but neither of them want to interrupt the conversation flow. 

“Nah, sorry to disappoint. We have the themed spring show in May, which I know is pretty late, you wouldn’t be there first to comment on that. But if we’d push it into March, there’d barely be enough time between Christmas and the spring show to choreograph new dances.”

“Fair enough, I hadn’t thought about that”, Harry admits. 

“So about semiannually there’s a big show and around Halloween we do a Halloween practice where there kids can come dressed up. It’s more about having a fun time than actual practice though because a lot of costumes are impossible to dance in. It’s super cute though, especially with Liam’s kids.”

Harry tries to imagine a dozen dressed up kids running around the studio and Louis right in the middle. Involuntarily he smiles. 

“Yeah? As what did you go last year?”

Louis shoots him a grin. “Guess.”

“A clown.”

“Nah.”

“I don’t know, just tell me”, Harry whines. There’s definitely a few costumes he could see Louis in but they probably aren’t appropriate around kids. 

“Peter Pan.”

“That’s not scary at all though. I’m disappointed.” Harry fakes a pout the best he can, pushing his bottom lip out. 

“It is though. In my second year we went to a super trashy themed birthday party and Niall spilled red wine over my whole costume and no matter what I tried, I couldn’t get the stains out.”

“You went to a themed birthday party?”, Harry cackles. It’s such a stereotypical thing to do but it feels like it actually only ever happens in movies. He’s never been to one himself. 

“Yup”, Louis replies, popping the p, grinning. “In green tights.”

Well, that’s an interesting picture right there. 

“Uh, nice”, is all Harry can come up with. While one side of him would like to dive deeper into the idea of Louis’ thighs and arse in tights, he knows that he shouldn’t. Not on a bench in the middle of a pedestrian street.

“Yeah”, Louis grins and it’s quiet for a moment before he changes topics again. “However, I’m hoping we can book the theatre again for the cup. I really want us to host first.”

“I’m sure you can figure it out”, Harry contributes not so helpfully, still caught up in his mental images. The way Louis looks at him says he knows, making him smirk like the little shit he is. 

“We’ll see how it all works out. Perrie’s been in contact with a studio in Liverpool and I’ve been talking to my friend in Manchester, maybe we’ll invite a couple more studios to participate, we’re not sure yet.”

They keep talking about dance related stuff for a while, including Harry asking urgent questions like, “Doesn’t it hurt when you fall on stage?” to which Louis had laughed and answered “No, you learn how to do falls correctly and softly. I don’t just crash down on my knees”. Harry also learns that they don’t dance barefoot because it’s hard borderline impossible to do pirouttes then. They wear protection pads they call feet thongs instead, which elicits a giggle from Harry. 

Eventually they have to part ways because Louis had promised to pick up Zayn somewhere, but Louis informs Harry that he’ll definitely make time for them to meet up over the weekend, which means much more to Harry than Louis could fathom. 

Harry’s in such a good mood that even Josh comments on it when he comes home that evening. And Harry is relatively sure that he’ll be there to sneak into the next Halloween practice to see Louis in his green Peter Pan tights. 

-

That weekend, they finally put a lable on it. It’s not a big discussion, they agree pretty quickly and Harry’s insides are all warm and cosy because _he’s in a proper relationship with Louis_. 

One of the first things Louis does as Harry’s boyfriend is drive them up to Golden Acre Park and go for a walk like an old married couple, with the ultimate goal to find some ducks to feed. 

When they arrive by the water a family with two kids is already at it, the two little girls excitedly throwing bread at the ducks and shrieking loudly when they come close to them. Louis opens the tupperware box that he’s been carrying in the hand that isn’t holding Harry’s. 

“Lettuce?”, Harry questions. 

Louis nods and holds the box out for Harry to grab a leaf of lettuce. 

“I googled what’s good for ducks and this is the only thing we had home. I’ve no idea why, Zayn’s girlfriend probably bought it, but she’ll survive it.”

Tearing up the leaf and cautiously approaching the group of animals, Harry nods and smiles. He’s positively surprised Louis even thought about researching what to bring as feed.

“Yeah I’ve heard that too, that bread isn’t good for them because they get malnourished or something? I’m not sure.”

They feed the evergrowing accumulation of ducks until there’s nothing left in the container. Harry has a suspicion that Louis lets him have most of the lettuce and prefers to watch Harry coo over how cute they look when they scoff whatever’s being throwen at them. 

Before Louis can fully put the lid on the container, Harry is hugging him tightly and whispering a happy thank you into his neck. His hair tickles Louis’ cheek and he wraps his arms around him like body memory. 

With everything that’s been happening between the two of them the past months, Harry wouldn’t have ever dreamt about it turning out this way. He’s confident in what he’s doing - and also who he’s doing. Or going to be doing, whenever they take that step. 

But he’s not afraid to be seen with Louis, not trying to hide and push the PDA to the safe place that either of their flats constitute. 

“’m glad you liked it”, Louis says as he lifts his chin enough for Harry to get the message and kiss him softly, appropriately as the family is still nearby and they don’t want to traumatise anyone. 

“Sure did”, Harry confirms between pecks, not complaining about Louis’ handing resting just above his bum, still clutching the tupperware. 

“Wanna leave soon? It’s getting chilly.”

“Alright”, Harry agrees but makes no move to release Louis. “Or shall I say, lettuce go?”

With a loud groan Louis pulls himself away and stalks away without looking back, obviously expecting Harry to catch up. He hears his boyfriend cackle about his own pun before Harry runs about to him and wraps his own hand around Louis’ smaller one. It feels so right. 

  
-

It’s convenient that because exams are over for all students now, everyone’s got a bit more free time, no more pressure looming above them like a sword that’s about to decide about your future. 

A couple days after their duck-feeding date, Louis invites him to a footie night with the lads.   
Harry's initial concern that he will make a fool of himself is easily appeased by Louis when he recalls how little Zayn is willing to move when they play and that Ed isn’t a natural either and therefore volunteers as a goalie most of the time. 

So Harry agrees, thinking that it won’t hurt to keep up some social interaction. He barely sees anyone but James, not having made a lot of friends in his classes yet. Sure, there’s a few girls he gets along with in his seminars and he’s been considering joining the after-practice-boozing that a few of the non-homophobic badminton guys have going on. But Louis’ squad is nice and he already knows the boys, so it’s an easy decision in the end. 

When Harry arrives at the park that evening, dressed in Nike trackies, a thick hoodie and his winterjacket he has yet to shed, the boys are already running and kicking the ball around. Louis’ wearing black Adidas bottoms and a matching long-sleeved red shirt, his hair hidden underneath a beanie and Harry couldn’t take his eyes off him if he tried. 

Lewis and Aiden are missing but Harry notices a new guy with very noticable red hair who turns out to be Ed. They get along smoothingly within the first three minutes. 

“Do you always play in the dark?”, Harry wonders before they’re about to form teams. 

Niall’s the first to answer after he’s taken a sip from his water bottle. “If it were summer right now, it’d still be light.“

“And it’s just easier to meet in the evening so no one’s got class or anything”, Liam adds as he stretches. If you’d compare Liam’s and Louis’ stretching range to anyone else’s, it’d be like comparing The Sun articles with Oscar Wilde. Which is probably a pretty strange comparison. 

“Aiden can’t make it, his flatmate’s flooded the bathroom”, Ed informs them as he checks his phone, tosses it back into his bag before pulling on goalie gloves and rubbing them together expertly. 

Louis laughs and pulls the beanie deeper into his face. “I swear that’d only ever happen to him.”

Teams are decided by Louis so coincidentally Harry ends up with him, as well as Zayn as their goalie, competing against Liam, Niall and Ed. 

Not even five minutes later it’s become pretty obvious that Niall and Louis are the ones basically running the whole match, both fiercely competetive but still determined to engage their teammates. While it severly bugs Louis when his shots are saved by a very dedicated Ed, he has endless indulgence when it comes to Harry’s lack of skills, always encouraging him to try and take a shot and cheering more than necessary when he scores a goal a good fifteen minutes into the game. 

Like always when Harry spends time with Louis plus others, he fully enjoys every second of it, no matter how embarrassing his football finesse is. But at after a few hours he reaches the point when he just wishes to go home and have a nice, chill evening, preferably with Louis alone and without flatmates in their vicinity. 

Louis probably senses what Harry’s thinking when his big hands cage his face and their kiss turns dirtier than their friends are willing to witness. 

“Ew, get a room!”, Niall shouts at them while Ed whistles loudly when Louis pats his boyfriend’s bum. 

Harry nods and looks Louis into the eyes, pupils blown by either the street lamp near them or the kiss. “Let’s go.”

Before he replies, Louis turns to Zayn who’s currently pulling on his jacket and gathering his things. “Z, you kipping at Gigi’s?”

Understanding what Louis is asking, Zayn shrugs and pulls out his phone from his jacket. “If you want me to.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen enough of your face today”, Louis jokes but knows from Zayn’s light smirk that he’s not offended. To be fair, when Zayn and Gigi had gotten together, Louis often had cleared the flat too, to give the pretence of privacy in their flat with paper-thin walls. Fortunately, their next door neighbour is a lovely old lady with severe hearing issues. 

  
Because there’s neither a sofa nor a living room where a sofa could be placed, they skip that part of snogging and end up straight in Louis’ bed. He’s still in his sports clothes, his thighs and bum muscular under the fabric and the image is fueling Harry’s eagerness. 

They don’t rip each other’s clothes off like they do in rom-coms, but their bodies move with certainty, Harry half-sitting up against the headboard of the bed and half-lying down, Louis first hovering him but sitting down quickly. 

“You looked good tonight”, Harry murmurs between kisses that involve way more tongue than he’d ever thought he’d like. For the first time he’s brave enough to put his hands on Louis’ arse, squeezing and resulting in Louis grinding down against him. It feels so much more sensual than the last sexual encouters he remembers whenever he wasn’t too drunk to do so. 

“Yeah?”, Louis fishes for more, smirking. He musters Harry’s face for a second before diving down, kissing a trail down his jaw and neck, ending at his collarbones that have become visible after he’s pulled off his hoodie. 

Barely being able to form a coherent thought, Harry breathes out a “Yeah”. Louis definitely knows what he’s doing, knows how to rile him up in no time. Slowly but surely, Louis scrambles down his body, leaving behind a trail of kisses that dissolve any concentration Harry had left in the air. 

On his way down Louis pushes up Harry's shirt, not to take it off, but to gain access to his waistband. Before he actually starts pushing it down, he mouthes just above it, tickling Harry. He looks up at Harry, intently watching his every move and reaction. 

“Can I?”

It makes Harry feel all warm inside, not only because of what’s about to happen, but also because Louis never fails to check in for Harry’s consent. While Harry wants to be a little smart-arse and correct him - _It’s may I_ , he doesn’t dare to. He’s not about to risk this. 

“Yeah.”

Louis hesitates another second, then his hands slowly appear by his face and push Harry’s trackies down. 

“Say the word and I’ll stop anytime.”

“Won’t happen”, Harry assures, teeth clenched in pleasure when Louis lowers his head, his warm breath hitting Harry’s clothed cock. His swollen lips wander over it and Harry can’t contain the low moan that escapes him. 

“Louis.”

In answer, Louis hums and pulls down the boxer briefs that had been the last restraining barrier between them, finally freeing Harry’s cock.

Unsurprisingly, Louis is talented at this too. Harry tries not to think about how he’s probably had more practice, because Louis is deep-throating him right now and no one else - and he wants it to stay that way. 

If Harry expected this to be over fast, he had no idea how fast it would be. He’s almost embarrassed by how close he is already when Louis bobs his head and sucks effectively like it’s the easiest thing in the world. 

“Mmpf”, Harry moans and doesn’t want to say out loud how close he is, but he doesn’t need to as Louis seems to read the situation correctly. When he deliberately doesn’t pull off, Harry’s done for. 

The orgasm hits him hard, stars dancing behind his eyes, leaving him breathless for an impressive amount of time. He has a feeling that the level of satisfaction won’t fall under a certain niveau with Louis and if this is it, Harry will be very satisfied in the future. 

When he finally unclenches his eyes and gathers enough energy to prop his body on his elbows, the first thing in his focus is Louis’ face twisting in pleasure. By the look of it, he’s not doing too bad himself, his hand squeezing his cock, his sport bottoms pushed to his thighs. 

For a moment Harry wavers, unsure how to act next. Should he offer help him? Should he just lean back and watch like a creep? Is Louis expecting a blowjob in return?

Right then, a little whimper escapes Louis and Harry’s decision stands. He reaches out his hand questioningly, raising his voice to make Louis notice the offer. 

“Let me help you?” 

Louis opens his eyes fully and scans Harry’s face. “You don’t have to.”

“I know, but I’d like to.”

Nodding, Louis changes position, fitting himself next to Harry so that they’re both laying down. He doesn’t initiate a kiss, perhaps not wanting to overwhelm his boyfriend with the taste of himself on his tongue - which Harry greatly appreciates. Instead he buries his face in the crook of Harry’s neck, planting little kisses there, impatiently waiting for Harry to pick up the task at literal hand without pressuring him. 

The first touch of Louis’ cock is both familiar and strang at the same time. It’s been a long time since Harry has last done this to anyone but himself and he definitely doesn’t want to suck for Louis’ sake -metaphorically and literally- so he pulls himself together and forgets his nerves the best he can manage. 

The movements of his hand are slow and considerate, nothing like the frantic rhyhtm Louis had going on before. Judging from the noises Louis keeps making, it’s driving him crazy nonetheless. 

After a little while, Harry likes to think he gets the hang of it, speeding up the frequency and alternating between squeezing at the base and teasing Louis’ wet slit. He keeps going and seeing Louis enjoy this so much is spurring him on to do well even more. Harry guesses Louis tightening his hand around his bizeps is a telltale sign how close is - he is proven right just seconds later. 

And while orgasms are great, Louis cuddling up to him with closed eyes and a cute sated smile after they’ve both calmed down and cleaned up, that’s what makes him really happy. 

  
A few days later they’re ice skating with a very excited Lilly and a very helpless James. Harry, clumsy as he is, stumbles to the ground with his arms flailing around hilariously and lands straight on his knees, soaking his jeans and probably leaving bruises. For a solid minute Louis can’t catch his breath because he’s too busy laughing at his pouting boyfriend, then he pulls him up to a stand. 

“I’m okay, thank you for asking”, Harry says and brushes off the none-existent dust from his coat, trying to regenerate what’s left of his dignity. 

Louis pulls him as close as publicly appropriate and whispers in his ear. 

“Are you in such a hurry to get on your knees for me?“

While he says he realises how this couldn’t only be taken as sexually as he intended to, but also seen as a reference to proposing. But thankfully Harry had gotten the tone Louis was setting, blushing an adorable shade of red. 

“Maybe.”

  
Louis doesn’t actually expect Harry to blow him that evening, but as soon as they get home after grabbing some food with Lilly and James, Harry is on him. And it’s probably what finally silences Louis’ concerns. Because receiving a blow-job, that doesn’t mean you’ve accepted being gay. But actually blowing a man? That’s next level. 

  
The next morning, Louis brings up the idea of telling their families. Of course it’s Harry’s decision how he’s going about this, and it’s not like they’ll have to sneak around in case Harry decides to not tell them yet. The chances of them finding out while they’re all the way back home is vanishingly low. 

But apparently Louis is in for surprises with Harry lately, because Harry agrees. It’s an easier decision like this, knowing he can just facetime them and in the worst case  
just pull the plug, hang up, and ignore their attempts to contact him for a few weeks. He really doesn’t expect it to be that bad though, maybe a little awkward but he can handle that. 

He voices that he’d prefer to talk to his family in private, which Louis understands straightaway. And so they inform their respective families about their current relationship status when they find the time for it. 

Unsurprisingly Louis’ family is chill about it. Harry’s not the first longterm boyfriend he’s introduced and everyone prior was accepted just as smoothly. They interrogate him, everyone having dozens of questions about Louis’ new better half, reaching from physical features to hobbies and education. It’s a pleasure to give a little information about his boyfriend - it almost feels like he’s bragging, which he’s definitely allowed to do. 

He gracefully leaves out the all the struggles they - or Harry - went through to get to this point. He mentions it was a bit of a bumpy road, but that he thinks they’ve figured it out now. Which is what he believes and everyone seems happy with the accumulated data. 

Harry’s confession is different. He’s glad he caught both his mum and sister at the same time, it’s better than having to do it twice. They’re both surprised, his mum a little lost on what to say exactly, but he doesn’t see disappointment or disgust in their eyes. They’re not close-minded like that. 

“I’m happy for you, love!”, his mum exclaims.

Gemma agrees and inquires the basics about Louis. Age, home town, what he’s studying and how they met. When it comes to the topic of hobbies, Harry doesn’t know what to say. He knows his family wouldn’t judge him but he doesn’t want them to have a typical gay picture in their mind before even meeting Louis in real life for the first time. Louis talks normally and Louis doesn’t wear make-up and Louis doesn’t wear flamboyant clothes, and he doesn’t want them to image him anything like that. You don’t need any of these features to be gay and Harry’s the best proof. 

So before he does anything stupid, he tries to direct the conversation back to academics, swooning about how ambitious and bright Louis is. Studying physics and doing well raises respect with people. 

It feels like a heavy weighing pressure has been taken off their shoulders when all that secret sharing is over. Not that they’d been hiding it because at this point everyone that’s around them for more than a few minutes will figure out what’s going on. But it finally feels like a proper relationship, with the first step to meeting the families done. 

It’s all going smoothly, too. They make time for each other and find a good balance between uni, boyfriend, friends, sports and work when the new semester starts. Spring is knocking on the door and it lifts everyone’s mood, especially when they get their exam results. Both of them have passed everything they’d taken, Louis with flying colours, Harry better than expected and that’s enough for now. He needs to read into where he wants to complete his placement anyways. 

One day in early March, Harry surprises Louis at the studio. Being in the area after having dinner with Katy, Cher and a few others from that loose circle, he decides to just pop by as Louis probably would’ve stopped by at his flat anyways. It’s a Tuesday and Louis and Eleanor have been training extra hard for the upcoming Christie cup that Louis is very involved in organising. 

Checking his phone, Harry sees that he’s a bit early - ironically, as usually when he needs to be here to pick up Lilly, something always comes up beforehand. Just as he’s at the top of the stairs, he hears Eleanor’s voice. 

“Once more?”

“Sure. We’ll get the lift right this time, I feel it.”

Shortly after, loud music seeps through the studio’s speakers and it’s even louder as the door between studio and pre-studio room is wide open, either for air circulation or simply because no one bothers them at this time of night. 

Harry recognises the song immediately, _Helium_ by Sia. Trying to be sneaky, he approaches the door but opts to stay in the shadow of the room in order to not be discovered by the dancing couple. Though they probably wouldn’t even notice him, fully focused on their performance. 

If Harry was amazed by their choreography at the _Dance Into Christmas_ , it’s nothing compared to this. It almost feels like they’re telling an actual story with the way they’re moving, sometimes energetically, sometimes painstakingly slow. A story about someone fighting against the urge to be with someone and then needing their help, their love, begging for it. 

They’re interpreting the song quite literal. When Sia things about having hit the ground, Eleanor goes down, Louis pulling her up effortlessly. 

_Your love lifts me up like helium._

So does Louis with Eleanor, lifting her so she’s over his shoulder, doing her splits in the air. It’s way more impressive than the _Dirty Dancing_ lift, taken way more seriously. 

Harry's eyes pinned on them the entire time, depending on the pose they occasionally sway to Louis' muscular legs and his shapely butt that’s amazingly emphasised by the leggings he’s wearing. It’s undeniabely hot how strong Louis is, usually hiding his fit body under his not very figure-hugging everyday clothes. 

Up this close, Harry notices that they’re both alternating between pointing toes and drawing their toes towards their bodies. It looks like it’s on purpose, not like a mistake and he wonders if it’s a thing in Contemporary. Maybe he’d ask Louis about that later. 

Soon enough though, the song comes to an end and both Louis and Eleanor remain in the final pose, breathing heavily but smiling widely as it obviously was a successful run-through. 

Without a second thought Harry starts clapping, probably would’ve whistled too if he was capable of doing that, causing the two dancers to look at him. 

“For how long have you been standing there?”, Louis inquires with a smile. 

“Hello to you too”, Harry jokes and gets a tongue out in return. “Just the last few minutes. It looks really good though, both of you. In my unqualified opinion at least.”

Eleanor smiles warmly at him where she’s standing with her water bottle clutched in her hands. “Thank you. Lou’s been really eager to perfect it before the cup.”

“Well, looks like it’s paying off.”

Louis walks towards him and presses a short kiss to Harry’s lips, avoiding to get Harry sweaty as well. “Thanks love.”

Eleanor politely pretends to get busy, unplugging the music system and gathering her things. 

“You need a ride?“, Louis offers. 

Harry just grins. “Sure do.”

Groaning in fake annoyance, Louis swats him on the arm lightly before turning around to pick up his things so Eleanor can lock up the room. They walk to Louis’s car, chatting about their day and saying goodbye to Eleanor. 

When Harry’s settled in the seat, he turns to Louis with a grin. 

“So. A fifty shades song?“

Louis starts the engine and laughs. “You’re not allowed to judge because you quite obviously have seen the movie too.”

“I coincidentally found the soundtrack on youtube”, Harry tries to reason.

“Mhh, sure.” Louis hums. “It wasn’t actually me who came up with that song though.”

“Eleanor?”

“Nope, Payno himself. My guess is he watched it with Sophia but he’s confessing to nothing. Not yet.”

“Liam watched a movie about BDSM sex and has got nothing better to do but browse for potential dance songs for Eleanor and you?”, Harry asks skeptically. He loves how every time he rides in Louis’ car, it’s a little less carefree, a little less quiet. It feels natural to throw his stuff to the backseat and skip songs he’s annoyed by. 

“At this point, I don’t even question his personal life anymore.“

“It’s a good song though. Similar to the genre you stuck to at the _Dance Into Christmas_.”

Louis looks at him when they’re coming to a halt in front of a red traffic light. He swipes his slightly sweaty fringe out of his forehead. 

“It is. Makes you feel something. I mean, they all do. But it’s easy to tell an obvious story. We had an idea what we wanted to convey before we were even through the song.”

Harry never expected that there’d be so many thoughts going into choreographing. His art teacher used to talk about art in a similar way Louis does about dancing and maybe that’s why dancing as a sport is so much more elegant than football. Sure, ball sports have tactics and everything, but it aims for a different reaction, a different feeling in the watcher. You’d never purposely display yourself as vulnerable like this in any other unrelated sport. 

Before Harry can drift too far into the dephts of his mind, a question from earlier pops up. 

“Why do you sometimes point your toes and sometimes … don’t?”

For a moment Louis looks surprised that Harry’s asking a technique related question, before considering his answer. 

“You’ve probably seen ballet dancers do super extreme pointed toes before, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, what we call Contemporary dance is a mixture of so many influences. And before we mixed it all together and called it Contemporary, classical ballet had been the dominant dance style for a while. So some clever brains thought, hey, let’s start another countermovement. And so modern dance was born and it’s way less strict - no more pointe shoes and corsets. Contemporary just combines all the good stuff.”

No matter how many times Louis rants about something he’s passionate about, be it dancing or physics or his family, Harry is amazed about how well informed he is, but still manages to break it down so it doesn’t sound arrogant when he explains it. He actually has in-depth knowledge of his sport’s history - Harry can’t say the same about himself and Badminton. It’s quite sexy, honestly. 

Instead of diving into a deeper discussion of historical dance movements, Harry just smiles at Louis. 

“What was the first song you did a show to?”

Louis doesn’t reply directly, too busy hitting the brakes hard in order to not crash into the suddenly slowing car in front of them. “Drive fucker”, he mumbles. 

“Where were we? Oh, first performance. A slower version of Paparazzi I think. I’d been dancing for many years before that but that was probably my first proper show, yeah.”

“When was that?”

“Uh, lower sixth I think? It’s been a while”, Louis chuckles fondly, perhaps thinking about his old studio back home. Before Harry can ask any more questions, Louis continues. 

“Back then I was the only boy in my group and in the choreo I played the one all the girls were chasing like Paparazzi. Great fun.”

Harry loves the sound of Louis laughing and joins in. “I bet it was. You must’ve been quite popular with the poor young girls.“

Louis shrugs. “Not like I cared.”

Harry agrees when Louis invites him to his place, not having any early morning classes so it wouldn’t matter if he slept over. It doesn’t take long after Louis steps in the room freshly showered that they’re on the bed, snogging wildly and grinding against each other in the search of friction. 

Sleeping with someone for the first time is probably one of the most important steps you can take in a relationship like theirs and they’re both aware of it. They haven’t explicitly talked about who’s going to top, but they both want it to be as comfortable as possible so it’s probably for a better that Louis decides to offer bottoming, having made good experiences with it in the past. Maybe they’d experiment more in the near future but for right now it’s too risky, too nerve-wracking. 

It turns out to be an excellent decision indeed, as despite Harry’s inital nerves, they both have to pull themselves together in order not to wake Zayn with pleasured noises and the bed consistently banging into the wall that night. 

-

  
Both the Christie cup and the dance cup are rapidly approaching. Most of the time Louis is running around organising yet another detail no one else had thought of so far. But besides the big organisational challenges, Louis is over the top excited for many reasons. Firstly, the cup is finally happening after all these years with just the hint of an idea ghosting in their minds. Secondly, Louis has been successful with his demands to be the first host city - which only makes sense considering Leeds is hosting the Christie cup this year. In the end, it doesn’t take much convincing for anyone involved: the other dancers are thrilled to escape their grey everyday life for a bit. 

Louis takes great pride in being the main organiser, entertaining both Perrie and Liam as his personal assistants at this point. He wants everything to go off without a hitch and even though he knows that most participants wouldn’t even blame him if something didn’t, he wants to do it right. 

So it’s no surprise that he’s unhealthily on the edge when he accompanies Harry to the official Cup football field to pick up Niall, who insisted on watching the Leeds-Liverpool game before coming to the studio with them. 

“You’re early, I’m not leaving until it’s over”, are the first words Niall says to them when they find him. He doesn’t even look up, his eyes fixed on the football players on the pitch, cheering whenever appropriate. 

“Liam’s already at the studio.” Normally Louis would follow the game with keen interest as well, but right now his eyes are glued to his phone as if he’s expecting a call announcing the apocalypse every second. 

Harry takes Louis’ phone softly, locks the screen and puts it in his boyfriend’s pocket. 

“Stop worrying, it’ll be fine.“ He accentuates his words with a soft kiss to Louis’ lips. 

“I know, I’m just stressed.”

“I know, love. But nothing bad is going to happen and everyone will be happy with the show and all the work you’ve put into it. And if not, then I’m here to defend you with all I have, until my last breath.”

That finally elicits a small smile from Louis’ lips. “Thanks, my hulk.”

They watch the rest of the game and when the referee’s whistle finally ends the agonising stoppage time, Leeds wins with a last-minute 3:2. After the initial joy or disappointment, depending on the team, has passed, the viewers spread out. 

“Harry? Is that you?”

Both Harry and Louis turn around to face the man whose voice they just heard. As soon as Harry sees who’s standing in front of him, he doesn’t know how to feel.

“Hello Charlie.”

“Oh it’s really you! It’s been a while”, the bulky man says and goes in for a distant side-hug. 

“How’s Leeds been treating you then? Haven’t heard from you since you left Liverpool.”

Next to Harry, Louis stands straighter and watches the whole scene attentively. None of them has noticed that Niall’s still there, until he pipes up at the mention of Liverpool. 

“Liverpool? What’s he talking about Harry? Please tell me you’re not from that hellhole!”

While Louis and Harry had talked about his time before studying in Leeds, this seems news to Niall. 

“I did my bachelor’s there”, Harry explains quietly. 

“Consider me ashamed of you, Styles, while I’ll be off to talk to Chris.” He turns to Louis. “Don’t you worry your little head, I’ll be back in five minutes tops.” With that, he’s off to talk to whoever Chris is. No one can keep up with the sheer amount of people Niall casually knows. 

“So? How do you like it here?” Charlie smiles kindly at them, looking genuinely interested. 

“It’s good, I’m happy here. Took a while to settle in, but yeah, I’m good.” He purposely doesn’t go into detail, but his answer seems to be satisfying. “Why are you here?”

“A friend of mine plays in our team, came along to support him. I’ve got a game on Sunday, actually. If you want to come watch.”

It’s just a well-meant offer but Louis doesn’t know that, and while he’s usually not of the jealous kind, he can’t help but ask, wanting to find out more about the fit man in front of him and in which relation he stands to Harry. 

“What are you doing then?”

“Oh, I’m on the basketball team.” Charlie musters him curiously now that he’s actively part of the conversation. “Sorry, who are you?”

“I’m Louis, Harry’s boyfriend”, he replies and shakes the hand Charlie is extending. 

“Well, nice to meet you, Louis. You doing any sports? Footie too?“ 

And what Harry does next is the thing that breaks his neck. Before Louis can answer, he cuts in. 

“Yeah, we play footie with the lads quite regularly. But uni’s keeping both of us busy, Lou’s studying physics.”

The second he stops rambling, he knows he fucked up. He knows by the way Louis’ shoulders slag and even though it’s not physically possible, he feels like Louis’ radiating ice cold, pissed off vibes. 

“Yeah”, is the only thing he adds. “If you excuse me, I’ve got to go. It was nice to meet you, enjoy your stay in Leeds.”

Charlie thanks him and before Harry can realise what the hell is going on, Louis’ already scurrying off in the direction they came from. He’s lost on what to do next. It’s not like he’s gagging to talk to Charlie, but it’d probably be nice to ask about a few people, how his old flatmate is doing. But the ticking bomb that is Louis is distancing from the pitch with every passing second and he should probably attempt some damage control on that construction site. So with a promise to come watch Charlie’s basketball game if he can arrange it, he’s wishing him a good time and running behind his boyfriend. 

“Lou, wait!” He doesn’t stop nor slow down nor turn around. It’s no secret he’s seriously pissed off, even his walk is petty. “Louis! Stop, please!”

Suddenly, he does stop with the most furious glare in his eyes that Harry has ever seen on him. 

“What, Harry, what?!”

“Sorry for that-”

“No, Harry, I’m fucking done with your sorry-saying! Fucking done. We’ve been at this point so many times and I’m always stupid enough to fall for it. I’ve given you so. many. fucking. chances. And yet you have the nerve to stand there, calm and unbothered and deny me!You denied me, Harry, and everything I’m passionate about.”

“Lou-”

“No, shut the fuck up. _Footie with the lads_ ”, Louis parrots him with spiteful edge to his voice. “We’ve been in a serious relationship for weeks, months now and you’re still ashamed to tell people your boyfriend is a dancer.”

“It’s not that-”

“You want a boyfriend but you don’t want a gay boyfriend because you can’t handle the stereotypes that come with being gay.”

“That’s not true, you know I love you the way you are”, Harry tries to calm him down, but nothing he could possibly say right now are going to help. Louis, who kept his arms crossed until now, throws his arms in their air, wildly gesticulating. 

“Fuck you do, Harry! You just told him I play footie for fun when I’ve literally been spending weeks of my time on organising a dance event, but dancing seems to be so fucking embarrassing to you, you can’t even bring yourself to mention it. Who was that guy even? He your ex or something? Have you fucked him before?“

“What? No! He’s straight! I was good friends with his flatmate back then.”

While Harry thinks this might de-escalate the situation a bit, Louis twists the words around on him. 

“Then why do you care so much what he thinks! You literally haven’t talked since you came here, he said so himself, so what’s the fucking matter with you?”

Luckily with the pace Louis ran away from Harry, they’ve put a bit of distance between themselves and the pitch. However, they’re probably still bound to cause a scene if they keep their argument up at the volume they’re currently shouting at each other. 

“You’re one to talk! I’m not the who’s been running around like a frightened chicken and annoying everyone with their obsession to be a perfectionist. You’re just as scared of judgement as me!”

Louis stares at him, unbelieving that Harry has just raised his voice as well. And he knows that it’s his fault they’re currently in this situation, but he’s not about to let Louis bash him with no words of self-defence. Subliminal anger is bubbling under his surface and he has to get a grip on controlling it before it all bursts out. 

“What the fuck, that’s not even remotely the same”, Louis groans annoyed. “Me trying to make the cup a pleasent event for everyone involved has literally nothing to do with you being insecure about your sexuality! I’ll wear skin-tight pink leggings tomorrow and dye my hair a rainbow colour and wear all the LGBT bracelets and I’d be fucking proud!”

“Yeah, you would. I’m not you though and I won’t ever be, thank god!“

“I can’t fucking believe you right now!”

“Well, that makes two of us! I don’t get what you’re making such a fuss about right now. I didn’t mention your hobby. Yeah well, sorry to break it to you but not everything’s about you and your fucking dance show.“

Louis looks like he’s considering just leaving, considering if all this is worth the discussion. It feels weird, standing here close to a football pitch, in their first massive relationship fight with so many more people around to potentially hear than in their four walls. 

“You’re missing the point”, Louis sighs, now reaching a calmer but still dangerous level of annoyance. “I don’t know what’s going on in that head of yours, but you’re so - so scared of people judging you for actually embodying gay stereotypes. And I’m sorry if you’ve ever made bad experiences with that, I truly am, but it doesn’t mean I’m willing to hide who I am. Maybe it’s a coincidence I’m into both men and dancing, maybe not. But it’s who I am and I’m not about to change that.”

For the first time in their argument, Louis gives him the chance to speak up. But Harry doesn’t know what to say and opts to close his mouth before he can say anything inconsiderate. 

“See, that’s the issues with stereotypes.” Louis easily slips into explaining mode, but his tone is still spiked with anger.  
“There is no such things as stereotypical in nature. Stereotypes exist because we make them exist, they’re a social construct. They don’t need to dedicate your life - but you let them. And I don’t want to deal with this shit anymore until you can admit to yourself - or whatever your problem is. Try to be proud of who you are, otherwise you’re a shame to everyone in the community.”

They’re harsh words, but Louis means them with every fibre. He’s gone through plenty of struggle before to finally be at the point he’s now, Harry’s aware of that. But it’s easy for Louis to say. He doesn’t have these blockades in his head. It’s like someone is vigorously waving a bright red flag before his eyes when he gets close to topics like these, certain stereotypes, and there’s nothing he can do to prevent the toxic distraction behaviour that involuntarily actives itself in Harry’s brain. 

Harry’s staring at some distant point when Louis turns around to walk away, snapping him into action.

“Wait!”

“No Harry, I need some time. You fucking ruined christie cup for me, by the way. Thanks for that.”

The last words are below the belt and only intended to stab and hurt Harry, to make him feel guilty. They’re having their desired effect. Defeated, Harry watches Louis moving further a way form him. 

“So what? Are you breaking up with me, just like this?“

Louis halts but doesn’t turn around to face Harry again. With a neutral, calculated voice he says “If that’s what you want.”

-

Numb is the word that comes closest to describe how Harry is feeling right now. The whole damn situation is so surreal. People just don’t break up like this, do they? Not over something so … unnecessary and not like that and not without having a desperate relapse where they both realise they’ve been stupid to let it happen.

Until Louis was out of eye sight, Harry had just stood there, watching him leave. He had a few options what to do next but none of them seemed right. 

In the end he had decided that going back and getting Niall involved probably wouldn’t help - especially not him, because he would definitely on Louis’ side, considering they were friends long before Harry had met them. Niall’s also a very carefree, easy-going person and Harry’s never seen him care about other people’s judgements before, so maybe he wouldn’t even understand his fucked up feelings. Hell, Harry doesn’t even understand what’s wrong with him himself. 

When Harry is home though, it feels wrong. Josh is out, unsurprisingly, and it almost feels like the silence is suffocating him. For a while he tries to distract himself, first with food, then with Netflix, later with Netflix and food. It doesn’t work. But maybe that’s a good sign because if you don’t find your thoughts hung up on your recent break-up, maybe it wasn’t meant to be anyways. 

It’s a spontaneous, perhaps stupid decision but when the fourth episode is about to start on autoplay, he gets up. 

  
They say _better late than never_ , but Harry’s still angry with himself when he realises he’s already missed a substantial part of the show - including Louis’ and Eleanor’s duet. There’s only a few seats in the last couple rows left and he doesn’t hesitate for long, plopping down on the first one he sees. 

Whenever a new group goes up on stage, they’re given two, three minutes to do a final warm up. Over the course of the evening, not everyone can stay warm through the entire show and the whole idea of it is to see dancers from other studios dance, so it’s only logical to not send them backstage and have them miss half the show to warm up. 

Harry’s restless when finally, after a trio from Liverpool and two groups from two different Manchester based studios go through their admittedly impressive performances, the Thursday group he’s been waiting for is announced. 

It’s a bit of a surprise when, after a bit of stretching and jumping, a new song comes on. Well, it does make sense considering Louis was telling him they’d finished their choreography for the spring show recently and considered trying them out.

Still, this song hits Harry differently. Makes you feel something, he remembers Louis’ words.

_I still hate you and love you again_

_And see you again_

Harry says it every time he sees a new performance of Louis’, but this is probably the most moving one. They’re swaying their arms and legs, like they’re palm trees in the wind, taking long, exaggerated steps and going down low. They jump with one leg thrown in the air, straight and pointed toes, only to have them drawn towards their bodies with their next movement. And this time, Harry doesn’t have to ponder about this. 

_Better stop crying, hello and goodbying_  
_Go on through me, slip on through my hands_

  
Sometimes Harry thinks it’s ironic how every song he listens to seems to be about Louis. But realistically he knows it’s because he makes them about Louis. 

_Oh why, why_  
_can’t, can’t_  
_You take me in your arms now?_

As their last pose they all crumble down to the ground and stay there like they’re broken.   
Harry stands up and leaves. 

-

It’s hard to function the following days. He restrains from texting Louis the night of the show because it’s not fair on Louis. And he needs to do some thinking before he runs into that conversation blindly. 

The next morning though, he figures out there’s not much to think about. He can see why Louis is upset, he’d be too if it were the other way round. Still, he can’t help himself being stupid over and over again. 

That one time when they fought in front of Harry’s uni, after he had denied having a boyfriend, Louis had said something to him. 

_“You don’t need to put a label on it. I just want you to be sure if you’re into boys, no matter if you’re gay or bi or whatever.”_

Well, that’s kind of bullshit. Because in the end it doesn’t matter if Harry’s into boys, what he defines as, the only thing he needs to know is that he’s into Louis, massively. 

So really, he didn’t only lose Louis, but also everything concerning his identity he’s currently sure of. Needless to say, he hates himself. 

He tries to contact Louis but all he gets back is **fuck off** , and after that no response at all. 

-

“We’re not really on talking basis right now.”

“Still?” 

Originally it had been Harry’s plan to let Louis cool off a few days and then show up at his place, but when Zayn hadn’t let him in and he had felt like a freaky stalker, he hadn’t tried again. And now that Harry’s talking to James in front of the seminar room, he can’t hide his mood. 

“Yeah.”

“That sucks”, James comments. When Harry simply nods, he carefully adds “it’s just an idea, but maybe you could come to the studio on Thursday? Like, you’ve got the excuse of picking up Lilly and if it’s not going well, we’ll all get some McDonald’s to distract you?”

“I’ll think about it.” 

James smiles at him. “Sure, just let my know early enough. And don’t worry too much - you’ll get it right with Louis, you always have.“ He pats him on the shoulder reassuringly. 

“Thanks. I really hope so.“

Harry doesn’t think he’s ever been this nervous heading up the stairs of the studio. Neither James nor himself are surprised he decided this way and Lilly seems ecstatic at the prospect of spending time with him after the dry spell the past few weeks. 

Their time table has changed with the new semester so this time, they are actually on time. That also makes it easier for Harry to be sure he’ll arrive before Louis and can catch him before his practice. It does nothing to calm his nerves though. 

Predictably, Louis is late. Only a little today, but still enough for Lilly to notice that they’re waiting for Harry instead of Harry waiting for her. She doesn’t seem to mind though, chatting away with Liam and her dad. 

Louis comes sprinting up the stairs and his head whips up as he’s caught off guard by Harry’s presence. For a second it looks like he’s just about to ignore him, but the spiteful tone of his voice is even worse than being ignored. 

“What do you want Harry?”

“Lou -”

It’s not an answer Louis wants an actual reply to, attempting to brush past Harry who blocks the way with his arms.

“Please, can we talk?”

“No we can’t because I really don’t want to talk to you right now. By the way, in my opinion it’s tasteless of you to show up here and corner me like this. And now fucking leave.” He hisses the last part lowly so that none of the children still around will notice. 

“Please”, Harry tries a last time but Louis’ already past him.

Harry is left standing there, staring dumbly at the door Louis just stormed through, not knowing how to act. 

James is apparently aware of the outcome of their attempted peace talk and slowly makes his way over. 

“Harry? Are you ready to leave?”

“Yeah.”

“McDonald’s?”

“Yeah.”

-

Harry’s perfect idea of spending his lonely, unexciting Friday night is sulking in his bed with greasy pizza and a rom-com that will make him cry. His flatmate, as always, has different plans and after hours of pushing Harry to crawl out of his own sorrow-filled cave, he’s finally convinced him to tag along to a party downtown. It’s in a club Harry’s never heard of before and the official theme is booty shaker and while Harry definitely isn’t about to throw it back, perhaps a little alcohol can’t hurt in his situation. 

He doesn’t expect to actually know anyone when they’re pre-gaming except the occasional acquantaince made in the hallway when Josh and his squad are leaving. It only takes a second to recognise a red head of hair though. 

“Ed?”

“Harry, man, what’s up?”

He shrugs, not wanting to go down that road right now. 

“Not much. What are you doing here?”

“Josh and I work together at the bar. We met when we were on the same shift, actually. How come you’re here then? You know Josh? I’ve never seen you around before, no offence.”

Harry gratefully accepts the bottle of beer he’s offered and takes a sip. There are more people in Josh’s room than Harry has ever even thought of trying to fit in his room and it smells like a mixture of highly concentrated alcohol, cheap beer and alcohol-induced horniness. Harry would hate hosting a gathering like this in his room, but Josh seems to enjoy playing host, supplying everyone with more alcohol.

“I live here. Josh’s my flat mate.”

Ed looks surprised. “Oh really? I never noticed.“

To be honest the only similarity Josh and him share is probably the door to their flat and while Harry had originally wished to have a flat mate he’d actually become close friends with, this is fine too. They get along when they meet each other in the kitchen and they’re not annoying each other and that’s already more than a lot of people get. 

The club is already buzzing with typical club energy, some people drinking their body weight in alcohol and others who are already past that stage are either making out on the dance floor or are trying to get there. 

For now, Harry decides to stick to the alcohol team, ordering a vodka energy for himself and Ed. Niall and Ed are quite similar, Harry notices quickly. They’re social butterflies and know about everyone they encounter, leaving Harry alone with their beverages after being invited to have a smoke outside. 

Feeling like a misplaced loser already, Harry decides to join Josh’s group who’s formed a circle on the dance floor and are dancing with very huge variety of skill between them. 

“Loosen up, man!”, a bulky friend of Josh’s shouts at him over the bass. 

He tries to follow that very generic advice and after another five songs he doesn’t stick out like a sore thumb anymore, letting himself feel the music without making an idiot of himself. 

Every few seconds someone bumps into his backside and he almost thinks he’s hallucinating when he turns around after the seventh time. 

The girl looking back at him is not only slightly intoxicated, judging by her uncoordinated but good dance moves, but also quite pretty. And she reminds Harry a lot of Frankie Sandford who in turn looks similar to someone he’s trying to avoid thinking about right now. 

Without the complaint he originally wanted to direct to her and her elbows, he shoots her a smile and turns back around. They play it cool for a while, as you do in a club when you’re not absolutely gagging for it. 

Long story short, Harry ends up kissing her square on the mouth. It’s just as uncoordinated as her dancing and it doesn’t feel right, but it sort of proofs a point to Harry. Or that’s at least what he keeps telling himself. 

When she asks him for his number before he heads off, he gives her a fake number and doesn’t even feel bad about it. It’s the same result of thoughts all over again. Harry doesn’t care that she is a girl, the only thing he cares about is that it isn’t Louis he was kissing and that’s the real fault in that equation. 

-

The sun is shining through the gap between the dark curtains, waking Harry up enough to blink his eyes a few times and fish for his phone on the nightstand. He’s got a new message from his sister that he answers with a few words and an email concerning his placement. 

When he opens Instagram to check his timeline for new posts, he sees that Niall has added a bunch of pictures to his story yesterday. He skips through them and figures that some kind of party happened the night before, judging from the blurry or flash-dazzled people Niall is posing with. Harry hasn’t spoken much to him since he sacked an internship for his second semester at BBC Radio Leeds, but he seems to enjoy it. 

The last photo in Niall’s story catches Harry’s attention. It features Niall next to Nick, the most popular radio host at BBC Radio Leeds, both of them with pints in their hands and cheering. It’s what’s in the background that has Harry’s blood boiling though. 

It’s Louis - kissing a girl. 

Or rather, making out as the kiss doesn’t look chaste at all. 

Harry is pissed for more than one reason. For one, Louis is kissing someone who’s not him and that someone is a girl. So many people have probably already seen Niall’s story and so many more will. Hell, Niall knows half of England and at least three fourth of Ireland. Everyone who knows they are in a … crisis will know Louis has obviously moved on very easily, and everyone who doesn’t know will think Louis is doing that girl. 

  
Thanks to his _excellent_ impulse control, Harry ends up in front of Louis’ flat not even twenty minutes later. 

Despite it being late Sunday morning and Louis being out until at least three thirty according to Niall’s photos, he looks well awake when he opens the door without Zayn acting as a barricade between them. 

“Uh?” He looks more confused than annoyed, and maybe Harry would think it’s cute under different circumstances. 

“You cheated on me“, Harry accuses him, getting straight to the point. 

“What?”

“Oh come on, don’t play dumb, you kissed some random chick last night! I saw it on Niall’s story!”

Louis’ gaze narrows on Harry’s face, scrunching up in mild anger. 

“Yeah well, and?”

“You won’t even answer my texts but you go out hooking up with strangers? Is that how much our relationship means to you?“

“I can’t believe I’m even having this conversation with you right now! We are on a break and I am a free man and I can do whatever I please to do!”

“ _We are on a break?_ Who are you, Ross Geller?”

They’re not shouting but it’s probably loud enough for Zayn and the next door neighbour to overhear them anyway. 

“What the fuck do you even want, you made out with some slut too!”

Harry freezes. 

“What?”

“You’re not the only one with information sources. Ed’s studying with Niall, in case you forgot. He saw you sticking down your tongue some poor girl’s throat when you were out.”

Ed’s studying with Niall, Ed saw him making out with the Frankie Sandford double in that club and knowing Niall, he probably found a way to bring at least three plus ones to that radio party last night, two of them being Ed and Louis. And Ed talks when he’s drunk. That traitor. 

It all makes sense now and suddenly, the tables have turn. They’re both on the same level, both having kissed someone rather than facing the real problem. 

  
“I wasn’t even into, I… I was drunk. I was drunk, I tried it but it felt wrong and I stopped the second I realised that”, Harry explains. “But you? You looked really into it! And thanks to Niall, everyone in Leeds has seen it by now.”

For a split second, something like hurt and regret flickers over Louis otherwise neutral face. 

“So you’re back to girls, then? Is this the straight side of being bi?”, Harry continues. 

“Have you figured out if you’re into men or just using me as a way to find out?”, Louis fires back. 

It hurts Harry more than it should and he can barely contain all the emotions bubbling up inside him. He stares at the wall next to Louis’ head, avoiding the blue eyes he usually loves. 

“I never used you, Louis. I came here because I wanted to get things right, because I want you and it hurts so fucking much seeing you snog some stranger. But fuck you for accusing me of that and fuck you for using my insecurities against me to start a fight all the time.”

Louis crosses his arms and stays quite despite looking like he has thousands of things to say. 

  
He knows it’s not realistic and his imagination is probably shaped by the substantial amount of rom-coms he has watched in his life, but he sort of hopes Louis would come running after him. But Louis doesn’t. 

-

They don’t talk for another one and a half weeks, mostly because Harry isn’t trying to reach out, waiting for Louis to come to him. So it’s kind of a shock when James calls him. 

“Can you maybe pick up Lilly today?”

“James…”

“Harry, please, I promise I’ve already asked everyone else but no one is free. Cassie is in Harrogate because her sister is about to have a baby and my boss just called me for an emergency at work.”

“You work at the cinema, how much of an emergency can it be?”

James sighs. “Please Harry. I know you don’t want to talk to Louis and I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t have to.”

“What about your neighbour?”

“He’s on holiday somewhere in Italy.”

“Now?”

“Focus please. I tried to get out of it but I need this job and I can’t afford to make a fuss over one extra shift now.“

Looking down on the bowl of noodles Harry was going to eat before he was so rudely interrupted, he sighs. He knows he’s caught up in his pride and Lilly has nothing to do with it. The little girl doesn’t deserve to be dragged into this. 

“Okay, I’ll do it.”

“Ace mate, thanks. I owe you!”, James breathes in relief. 

“Yeah, you keep saying that”, he says with a light grin in his voice but his thoughts are going a mile an hour. Maybe he can time picking up Lilly in a way that makes it possible to not meet Louis. Being early should probably do the job. 

  
He plans his way to the studio well, making sure to take an early bus and everything. Except, the bus doesn’t show up until twenty-three minutes later and what even is it with busses here lately?

Of course he’s late when he arrives because fate wouldn’t have it any other way with him. Besides the music booming from the studio, there’s no noises when in the hallway and no one else here as all the kids are probably on their way back home already. 

He enters the anteroom and opens the door to the studio energetically. He’s already familar with the sight that awaits him inside - a dozen of dancers doing their jumps and pirouttes and Lilly watching them with big admiring eyes. 

The little girl is actually the first one to notice him. 

“Harry!”

Before Harry can approach her to apologise for being late, he sees Louis stumble in his movement and go down with a loud thud, groaning when he hits the ground. 

“Fuck, are you alright?”, Liam is the first to knee down next to the boy who is clutching his right ankle like he’s in severe pain. 

“Yeah“, Louis replies with his teeth clenched, his eyes not leaving Harry’s. 

“He’s here to pick up Lilly”, Liam mumbles quietly to explain his presence. 

“You knew about this?“  
“Lilly told me about it when I asked her to come watch us because no one had picked her up yet.”

Meanwhile Harry is quick to talk to Lilly but she doesn’t even seem bothered, loving to watch Liam’s and Louis’ group whenever she gets the chance to. She is worried about Louis though, who is still sitting in the same position. 

Lilly urges Harry to approach him and offer their help and Harry is yet again amazed by her sincerity. He’s got to say, James and Cassie have done a good job with her, especially with them being so young. 

“Are you hurt, Lou?”, she asks when’s she’s right next to him, inspecting his foot. 

“I’m good, don’t worry. I was just … distracted for a second. Silly me.”

Louis doesn’t look as good when he tries to get up, letting out a pained huff and not putting weight on his foot. 

“Is there anything we can do?”, Harry asks with a small voice. He feels a bit out of place, like everyone is watching him critically. 

“No thanks”, Louis declines, obviously attempting not to be impolite due to their audience, including Lilly. 

“You should probably have someone take a look at that.” Liam nods towards his foot.

“Once again, no thanks. I just need a short break, then I’ll be good to go again.”

“Mummy always says we need to treat ouchies before they get bad”, Lilly pipes up. 

“And your mummy is correct with that, Lilly”, Liam says and pats her shoulder. “You should really go see a doctor. Come on, I’ll take you.”

“Or I could take you.” 

Louis’ head whips to him violently and if looks could kill, Harry’s head would be rolling right now. 

“You don’t even have a car”, Louis replies. 

“No, I don’t. But you’ve got one that you probably won’t be able to drive for a while once you admit that your foot hurts.”

“I know you don’t want to hear it”, Liam contributes. “But he’s right.”

Louis huffs and tries to shift his weight but as soon as his injured foot touches the floor, he pulls back and gives in. 

“Fine.”

He hobbles towards the anteroom to gather his things and an ice-pack to hold against his foot and Harry double checks if they’ve got everything so James won’t have his head for forgetting Lilly’s bag. Getting Louis down the stairs requires Liam’s help as well and everyone lets out a relieved breath when they’ve made it to the door without further incidents. 

“I need the keys”, Harry reminds Louis. 

“You better not crash her.”

Harry doesn’t bother to answer that and rounds the car to settle in the driver’s seat once they’ve got Louis and Lilly seated. He adjusts the seat and the mirrors and earns an annoyed huff for that. 

“It’s surprisingly clean in here.” It’s a poor attempt of small talk and Louis doesn’t seem interested in it, choosing to look out of the window irritatedly. 

“Please just drive.”

The drive to the hospital is quiet and despite all the déjà-vus Harry has lived through in his relationship with Louis, having the same discussions all over again, this one is the most vivid, reminding him of the first time they truly talked to one another. But this is the first time ever sitting in the driver’s seat and he definitely is a bit nervous because he doesn’t want to disappoint. The last time he’s driven a car was around christmas when he visited his family and he usually needs to practice a bit before he gets in the groove.

And while he wants to say all of that, he stays silent because this is not the time and place and Lilly doesn’t need to hear their argument that would most likely be the result. 

“We’re going to take Louis to the hospital now and then I’ll call your dad, okay?”

“Okay”, Lilly agrees easily. 

The waiting room in the ER is surprisingly packed, with at least three people groaning about their stomach and another guy with a swollen foot. Lilly finds the corner full of toys quickly and hands Louis a book with the order to read him a story while they’re waiting for Harry to come back. 

Harry makes his way out of the hospital to phone James. It’s surprisingly chilly for a spring evening, but at least it’s not getting dark yet. 

“Harry, I was just about to call you!”, his friend’s voice echoes through the speaker. 

“Listen James, we’re in the hospital right now -”

“What? Is Lilly okay? Are you okay? Is-”

“Calm down, Lilly is fine and so am I. Louis injured his foot and I offered to drive him. We don’t know how bad it is yet but I probably need to take him home…”

“No problem, my boss just told me I can leave early because suddenly we’re overstaffed - that freaking idiot I swear - so I could be at the hospital in half an hour and you can stay with Louis.”

Apparently, fate does work out in funny ways sometimes. This definitely isn’t how Harry saw his evening going and it’s basically the exact opposite of avoiding Louis. But if he were in his position he’d probably be glad if someone stayed with him too and it’d be sort of shitty for Harry to call up Liam or Zayn and have them come get Louis just because he can’t act like an adult. 

“Ace, just text me when you’re here and Lilly and I will come out.”

“Alright, see you later!“

  
A good half hour later James texts him and Lilly and Harry meet him in the hospital parking lot. 

“Thanks again, mate”, James says as Harry hands him the girl’s belongings. 

“No problem, you know I love spending time with this little bugger.”

“Daddy I’m hungry, can we please get maccies?”

She puts on her best puppy eyes and James doesn’t stand a chance. Harry watches them fondly. 

“Guess we’ll be making a detour then.” Lilly cheers loudly and hugs her dad. James turns to Harry with a more serious face. “Are you okay? With this whole situation?”

“Yeah, yeah. I mean, it’s a bit weird but I can handle it.”

James nods as he runs his fingers through his daughter’s hair. “You should probably get back to him then.”

“Yeah.”

“Text me later when you know what’s up with his foot!”, James says before they say their goodbyes and head off to get some fast food. The more Harry thinks about it, the more he could use some McDonald’s as well. And a shot of booze, or five. 

  
As it turns out, Louis’ foot is sprained and while Harry is happy it’s nothing more serious, Louis seems to think it’s the end of the world. 

“Are you crying?” He can’t keep the surprise out of his voice but it also hurts to see Louis like that. He’s obviously upset and overwhelmed with everything and Harry hasn’t been comforting him like he usually would’ve when they weren’t in the mess they’re in now. 

The expected sassy “no” never comes, causing Harry to direct his attention to the passenger seat for more than a split second. Louis is actively trying to hide his tears, turning his face and body towards the window without moving his bandaged foot. 

“Hey, c’mon, what’s up. I know this all is a weird situation but you can still talk to me. I’m right here.”

The strong facade Louis put up lasts for another few seconds before he gives in with a heartbreakingly sad sob. 

“The spring show is in three weeks.”

“Oh Lou…” He doesn’t know what to say, the last thing he wants is to make it worse. “Maybe you’ll be able to dance then, maybe not. But you can still be there with all the people you love and that’s what’s most important.”

Luckily they’ve arrived at Louis’ flat and Harry has parked the car without grazing any other car’s so that’s a success. But it also keeps Harry from laying his hand on Louis’ thigh for comfort and that’s probably the even bigger success. 

“Come on, you’ve got to rest now and we can think about everything else when we come to that bridge.”

Louis hops out of the car and hobbles to the front door, waiting for Harry to catch up with the keys. 

“Uhm… do you want… do you want me to help you? Or do you want… I could see if Zayn is home and he can help you up if you’d prefer that?”, Harry offers. 

“He isn’t”, Louis replies as he carefully makes his way to the stairs. “He’s at Gigi’s. I texted him and he offered to come get me but I said it’s fine.”

Trying to process the news, Harry scrambles to Louis’ side, supporting his weight that isn’t grabbing the handrail. It’s going to be exhausting for Louis to hop up all the stairs to their flat on the third floor, but Louis is fit thanks to his regular excercise and Harry’s right next to him. 

“That was easier than I thought”, Louis says when he opens the door to his flat. “I can already move my foot to the left a bit without it hurting. Maybe I will be able to dance at the show after all.”

“Easy tiger, it hasn’t even been a whole three hours and the doctor put some nice pain-relief gel on your foot that will probably lose its effect in a few hours. Go lay down on your bed and rest your foot, I’ll bring you something to eat and drink and some ice.”

“At your command, doctor Harry.” 

He doesn’t smile and his face is still a bit blotchy from the little emotional escapade in the car, but it lifts the mood nonetheless. Sometimes he doesn’t know when to start a fight but he does realise, this definitely isn’t the time. Harry had been nothing but helpful and understanding with him all evening. 

“Are the painkillers still in the kitchen cabinet?”

“Yes”, Louis answers as he plops down on his bed with a groan. 

A few minutes later Harry enters the room with a plate full of sandwiches, a bottle of water, an ice-pack and a blister of painkillers that Louis might need when he wakes up the next morning. 

“Here.”

“Thanks”, Louis says as he accepts the plate he’s handed. Harry’s not moving to sit down on the bed next to him or even on the desk chair, but rather lingers close to the door as if he’s ready to leave whenever he’s told.

“Are you going to be okay on your own? Or…?”

“Can you stay a bit? Zayn won’t be back until late or maybe even tomorrow and I…” _don’t want to be alone right now? miss you? want to talk to you?_

All of these are options going through Harry’s head but Louis doesn’t finish his sentence. Harry agrees to stay anyways. 

“Thank you”, Louis mumbles after having eaten half of the sandwich. “For everything. You didn’t need to.”

“No I didn’t need to. But I wanted to.”  
“I mean, it is kinda your fault all of this happened…”

“Excuse me?”

“Yeah, excuse you for just turning up at the studio unannounced.”

There’s no bite in Louis’ voice and their whole conversation is so much softer than their last few encounters. It’s like they’ve put their little feud aside for something more important, namely health. 

“Sorry, James asked me to pick up Lilly.”

Humming, Louis finishes the rest of his food in record time, apparently having worked up quite the appetite in the sterile hospital rooms. But now that the only distraction is gone, they’re just sitting there, face to face, and don’t know where to start. 

“Are we just going to go back to ignoring each other once I go home? Because I don’t want that.”

“Me neither”, Louis says, not daring to look the other boy in the eyes. 

“So what are we going to do?” Harry wants to give Louis the option to voice what he wants, but in his mind he’s already made up the only possible outcome to this situation he’ll be happy to go home with. 

“I don’t know.”

“Look, I know we’ve been at this point a few times already, but the past weeks have been hell for me. I hate not hearing from you or talking to you and there’s so much more I missed.“

Staying quiet, Louis just nods for Harry to go on. 

“I hated seeing you kiss that chick. Still do. I don’t want you to kiss other people and I don’t want to kiss other people either, no matter if they’re male or female.” His eyes wander around the room, from the desk to his right to the window and finally land on Louis, who’s looking so small with his bandaged foot resting on a pillow.

“I know we’ve had way more downs in our relationship than other people but we’ve also had a lot of ups afterwards and maybe our equation is a very jolty sinus curve or whatever you said back then. But I’m sure, no I know we could work out and I don’t want to throw all of this away.“

He impatiently waits for Louis to react after his heartfelt little rant. 

“Me neither”, Louis repeats. It’s not the big emotional love confession Harry had hoped for and he isn’t jumping into his arms, which also would be quite difficult due to his current condition, but it’s something. 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Harry breathes out in relief. “Good.”

When there’s more silence between them and they both still stare at each other unsure what to say, Harry once again takes the lead that day and saves them from more awkwardness. 

“So that’s it? We’re back together then?”

Louis nods. “Yes.”

“That was… easier than I thought”, Harry admits. 

“I’ve been thinking a lot too, especially the past week and I missed you too, so much. And maybe sometimes it’s better to just take the easy way.”

“Can I kiss you?”, Harry bursts out before he can contain himself. Back in the days he never would’ve been the first one to initiate something like this so short after a fight, or in general. But now, his now-again-boyfriend just smiles contently and nods, patting the place next to him. 

“Definitely.”

-

  
Three weeks later, the _Holbeck spring show_ is about to start any minute and Harry is restless in his seat. This time he’s not hidden somewhere in the back where he can barely see and people won’t notice him. No, this time he’s in one of the central front rows, right in the middle of excited parents and proud partners. 

Louis is going to dance and Harry is probably going to worry every second that his foot might give out, but even if it did, Louis would be too proud to let anyone know during their performance. 

No matter how many times Harry tried to talk him out of it, Louis wouldn’t have any of it, claiming his foot was feeling well and he’d just bandage it up and take a pain killler, which made Harry scoff even more. 

But what can he do - his boyfriend is damn stubborn. 

James and Cassie, who are seated next to him, are off to talk to some other parents and Sophia, sitting to Harry’s right, excuses herself to the loo, so Harry whips out his phone to text Louis good luck one last time when someone touches his shoulder from behind.

“Hey, Harry! Didn’t expect to see you here again!”

“Hey Katy. Well, what can I say, this time I was actually early enough to get a good seat and everything.”

She smiles warmly at him. “Here for your friend again?”

“Boyfriend, yeah.”

She doesn’t seem surprised but congratulates him and wishes him all the best before the lights dim down and the show is starting. 

This time, Harry sees the whole perfected choreography of Eleanor’s and Louis’ duo and for the first time also the new choreography with their Thursday group. It’s truly magical, watching Louis happy like that and he’s a hundred percent proud of him. 

And when he watches Liams’ kids, including Lilly, dance to that popular _Pirates of the caribbean song_ , he’s also a hundred percent sure that he’ll be there to watch the kids and Louis dress up for the next halloween practice - and many more after that. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it, maybe leave some feedback if you're up for it :)


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